Responsibilities Of An Idol Leader | KNJ X OC ✔️

Prologue

I've been head-over-heels in love once in my life. Twice, if music counts since it's a major love of mine.

Anyway, I met this girl through mutual friends when I was going through my trainee days. She was a game-changer in my life.

I was eighteen years old and she was nineteen*. It was around Christmas time in 2012 when I was visiting friends in Ilsan during some downtime from all the rigorous training.

My friend Kiyong decided to throw a little gathering for friends. My other friend,
Bohyun, showed up with his girlfriend, who happened to bring along her best friend, Sooyoung. Bohyun was up front with me and said he and his girlfriend had the intention of fixing me up with her because they were both convinced Sooyoung and I would really hit it off with each other. I was skeptical, at first. And, I also told him that my trainee schedule was so ridiculously packed that being with someone at that time seemed impossible.

But, then, I ended up alone with Sooyoung, sitting outside on the balcony of Kiyong's parents' home, later that night. She had said something in English earlier in the evening to someone else at the gathering. I had approached her, starting conversation by asking her if she's fluent in English. I assumed she was, because there was no trace of an accent when she spoke in that other language. She told me she is fluent and that English is actually her first language since she was born in the US. I learned that her parents were both from Korea but they moved to New York for job opportunities in the medical field. I also learned that she was trying to follow their footsteps by entering the medical field, as well. At the time we met, she was attending Yonsei University as a pre-med student. I told her that was one of the schools I was considering attending if I didn't go into music. I also found out that her IQ is higher than mine. And, well, I was ultimately smitten after I found that bit of information out. I'm a sucker for a brainy woman.

Not only is she completely brilliant, but we had the same interests in pop culture, our musical tastes, literature, and other such things. When I shyly admitted I learned English from watching Friends, she squealed saying how she grew up loving that show. I can remember us quoting our favorite lines from the show, and just cracking up with one another. We were showing each other the books we both had on our iBooks apps. She actually recommended a couple novels that night that are still some of my favorite books to this day.

Sooyoung and I ended up really hitting it off, just like Bohyun and his girlfriend predicted. Before the night ended, Sooyoung and I made sure to exchange numbers. There was no way I wasn't going to keep in touch with her. I couldn't deny the fact that I was completely intrigued by her.

It was lucky for us that she was attending school in the same city where I was training. Though, we both had busy schedules, we made it work and we were able to meet up as much as we were able to. We developed a friendship first, and within a year, I asked her if she wanted to try to be together as a couple, and she did. It was risky since I had just debuted with BTS. But, I was starting to care deeply for her.

I kept my relationship with her to myself, with the exception of my sister, Kyungmin, having knowledge, because she and I had mutual friends, and she ended up becoming close with Sooyoung. Jin and Yoongi eventually learned about her. Since the group was who I was constantly surrounded by, I needed a couple of the members to confide in about her whenever I needed relationship advice. And, since Jin and Yoongi had more experience with women, at the time, I naturally gravitated towards them for that kind of help.

Everything was going well with us. I was falling for her and I know she felt the same deep feelings for me that I had for her. But, a major conflict occurred two years after she and I officially became a couple.

In 2015, Sooyoung made a drastic life choice. She was accepted into the school of Medicine at Stanford University. She debated going, but I knew it was a chance of a lifetime for her. It's a prestigious school and I didn't want her to make the wrong decision and pass up something amazing such as this opportunity. I told her to follow her dreams and that we could try to make a long-distance relationship work. Plus, the boys and I would travel in the States a lot, so I thought maybe we could make it work, somehow.

A couple months into her living in California, and I started to feel her grow more and more distant with me. It honestly left me an emotional wreck and it was distracting me from focusing on my career. As the leader of my group, I couldn't fall apart. I had to stay strong for the other members.

So, I decided to try to call it quits with Sooyoung. At first, she said she didn't want to end our relationship completely but that she's just dealing with a lot. I told her that maybe it's a good time for the both of us to take a break and focus on ourselves. She didn't want the break up and begged for us to keep trying. Then, I admitted to her that our long-distance relationship was mentally draining me and it was keeping me from focusing on my musical career. When I told her that, that's when she seemed to agree that breaking up would be the best decision. She said that hearing me say that she was the cause of me faltering and not focusing on my career was something she didn't want to happen. She told me she wouldn't want to keep me from reaching my full-potential as a musician and obtaining the success she thinks I deserve. And, I also didn't want to keep her from being successful either, so we made that difficult decision and ended it between us.

I went on with my life. I put most of my focus into BTS. My band is like my second family. The boys in the group are like brothers to me. I look after them and try to be the best leader for them. I love that I get to make music for a living. I make music that I love and I couldn't ask for anything more.

Yes, sometimes I wish I had a companion. I wish I had a woman I can come home to or who I can communicate with to share good news with or vent to, but, I have a good support system, so a relationship isn't completely necessary at the moment. I'm so busy as it is that I don't think I could ever make enough time if I were to commit to someone. I can handle a fling, but definitely not a relationship.

It's rare, but, from time to time, my mind drifts back to my first love. Whenever she comes to mind, I try to push her out of my thoughts. She's in my past and she needs to stay in the past.

Who knew, that years later, I would be seeking her.

*********

A/N:
Welcome to the third story of the Bangtan Couple Encounters Series! This is going to be quite the ride!

*These are their 'international' ages. In Korean age, Namjoon would be 19, and Sooyoung would be 20 when they first met.
[Well, it's now 2023, and the Korean age counting system has now changed. June 2023]

With 'Backstage Encounters' and 'Worthy Of An Idol,' the prologues were in the perspective of the main female characters. But, with a couple of the other members' ffs, I'm going to have the prologue and their perspectives be the main focus. That's not to say that their romantic counterparts aren't as important. But, the way I have the story mapped out in my head, it makes more sense to have the focus more so on Namjoon.

One more thing! This story takes place in a universe where COVID-19/ the pandemic did not exist. This story is an escape from that reality.

🎵Song to check out: "All We Ever Needed" by The Early November

Thank you for checking out my new fanfiction! Please don't forget to vote and even comment! It's motivating! XOXO✨
-MissD