Responsibilities Of An Idol Leader | KNJ X OC ✔️

10. Support from the Guys

04/04/2021

Sooyoung and I have been messaging each other since I spoke to her last night. I have been diligently planning the New York trip and have informed her that my flight and hotel has been booked and that I will be arriving on the 10th of April with my sister, Sejin-nim, and friend/security staff member, Chulsan.

Sooyoung said she's thrilled that Kyungmin will be joining me on the trip and I can say the same. I'm glad Kyungmin was able to take some personal time off in such short notice. Apparently, she hasn't taken a proper day off in a while and she claimed it to be a personal family issue, so they allowed her to use her personal time off even if they weren't given a heads up sooner. Kyungmin and Sooyoung were really close back then and I'm glad they'll have an opportunity to rekindle their friendship.

I also messaged Sooyoung asking if it's okay to arrange a paternity test because if Moonsik is really my son, I want to make sure that it is on paper, and that I can be known as one of his legal-guardians. She said there was no way she could argue against that and that she was hoping I'd ask. I informed Sejin-nim and he said he'll try to contact a company who can administer a legal DNA paternity test while we are visiting.

In the morning, I had let all the boys know that I needed them to be present at the dorm this evening for a meeting. I let them know that I was going through something and I wanted to discuss it with the whole group.

It is now 8pm, and we are all congregated in the living room.

I am seated in the only recliner chair in the room. The first men to file into the living room are Jungkook, Taehyung, and Jin. They all decided to take the couch adjacent to me, on my left. Not long after, Jimin and Hoseok enter the room and take the other couch across my chair. Last to arrive is Yoongi, and I get up, offering the chair to him. As I get up, Yoongi and I make eye contact and he nods at me in a way to give me a source of comfort, which I admit does help my nerves calm down a bit.

I stand up and pace in front of them a few times, back and forth, while I wait for everyone to settle in their spots. Some chatting occurs since everyone has been doing their own thing all day. Since they haven't seen each other much, they naturally end up having small discussions to catch up.

After walking back and forth, slowly, in the front of the living room- lost in my thoughts on how I was going to share the news to the rest of the guys, I am interrupted by one of the members' voices.

"Hey, Namjoon, we're all here, like you asked us to be. What is this meeting about? You're making us nervous," Hoseok says in a high volume to get my attention.

"Oh, yes. Sorry! I was just trying to form the thoughts in my head," I explain to him and the rest of the group.

"Well, start whenever you're ready," Jin encourages me. He and I connect eyes, and again, I feel comforted.

If Yoongi, Jin, and Jimin have been so supportive of this whole situation, it seems I shouldn't be nervous about letting the rest of the guys know, right?! But, this is such a major change in my life that it could impact the group down the line. And, as the leader, I just don't want to let them down in any way.

I clear my throat and allow myself to begin.

"So, what I'm going to share is only between us and a select few people outside of our group. Jin and Yoongi were the first to learn about what I am going to share with you, for good reason. Jimin happened to hear a conversation regarding this topic, so he also knows. I wanted to wait to tell the rest of you until some areas were clarified."

I pause and look at the members, especially Hoseok, Taehyung, and Jungkook. They look like they are listening intently to what I am saying. I continue.