I Don't Eat CupCakes (wattys2015)

Chapter Nine

Today is Chase's football tryouts. Chase has come in a little into the school year so he wasn't there for the real football tryouts so he gets a special practice. He has to tryout for football by impressing both the coach and the team. Which is something I don't think is easy to do, especially with Kevin so determined to keep his status as the football team captain. But whatever happens to Chase, Tifanny and I warned him.

The coach blew his whistle and the boys talked on the field while Tifanny and I watched on the bleachers. I think they were playing an actual game of football to see how well Chase worked with the team but I couldn't be sure. I know nothing about football or any other sport. Tifanny is on the same boat as me. All I know is that you make a touchdown in football and a goal in soccer. Everything else is like trying to be in the same level as a genius. In other words: I'm dumb to sports.

Dumb or not I think Chase is doing a good job with playing and doing all the exercise and might I say he looks hot all sweaty along with all the other guys and Tifanny totally agrees with me. As the boys played the coach was looking approvingly towards Chase and Kevin looked like he wanted to beat him up black and blue. No matter how popular Chase was he didn't want to lose his title to a newbie-or anyone.

When the game ended Tifanny and I cheered for Chase because he gave us a thumbs up signaling that he made it in the team. I think I was glowing with happiness because after Chase stepped out of the locker rooms no longer sweaty I ran up to him and gave him a hug. I have forgotten all the problems I was going through when I was with Chase. He made me forget. He somehow gave me energy to run and feel happy no matter how weak and broken I feel. I don't know how he does it.

"We need to celebrate," Tifanny announces. "We will go to my house so my mom can make us milkshakes and we'll watch a movie." Chase and I both agreed with Tifanny's plan so we headed to Tifanny's car and she drove us to her house. It wasn't long before we were sitting at the kitchen counter ordering our drinks like Ms. Helena was a bartender or something. She told us that the drinks would he ready in a few minutes so we all sat down on the couch and debated about what movie to watch. Once we agreed on which movie Tifanny said she would wait in the kitchen to bring back our drinks. Then when Chase wasn't looking she winked at me.

Oh my gosh she's doing again. She's trying to give us some alone time. My best friend is crazy. But I can't live without her. If I didn't have her, I don't think I'd be hear. She-other than my mom-is the only reason why I'm not such a wreck. At least not as big as I would be if I didn't have her. In all honestly, I don't think I would even be smiling. I love her so much.

"Congratulations. I knew you would make it in the team... even though I never saw you play not even once." He laughed at that. But I don't find myself funny. I laughed with him anyway.

"And congrats on not getting beat up by Kevin yet. But I guarantee you, when you become captain he will be angry and he will hunt you down to crush you." He looked a little scares by that so I reassured him that everything will be fine. "As long as you don't give him another reason to want to hate you then maybe you will become friends with him and then he won't want to beat you up as bad as he does now." He looked like he wanted to pee his pants. Maybe I'm not so good at this.

"This is not reassuring."

"Okkkay forget I said anything. Why is Tifanny taking so long? Tifanny! We're ready for those shakes now." As if she understood my urgency she appeared with three tall glasses of milk shakes and gave us each one. We all took a long gulp of it with our straws. "Mmm chocolate."

You must be thinking, what am I doing drinking a chocolate milkshake?!? The thing is that Tifanny has been helping me get over my fear of eating. Eric doesn't have super vision in order to see if I've really gained weight or not. All I have to do is eat little by little so he won't notice. And it's not that I don't eat at all. I eat things every once and a while. Now Tifanny is helping me by trying out different foods that are good for me and keeping an eye on me so that I don't throw up. By this she made me give up on trying to escape her helping me. And now we are basically attached by the hip so if Eric does want to see me she's always by my side. But Eric isn't seeing me as much. Thank God for that. Maybe he's with his other girlfriend forgetting all about me. She does look happy with him. But I can't help thinking about her. If she is really happy or if she's acting it out. Of she's like me. A victim of Eric drawn in because he did something heroic for us. Is she suffering? I try not to think about her but how can I not? I don't want another girl to end up like me. Or worse.

I used to cut. When I couldn't take the pain anymore and feel like I needed to control some part of what's hurting me. So I cut. And I have scars. But they are not as visible. And I used to take pills because I couldn't sleep at night. At first one helped, but then I needed two a night and then I needed it in the day because Eric was everywhere. So image her, or some other girl thinking about suicide? I was at that point once. Thinking that it would all end. That Adam and Eric wouldn't be my problem anymore. And then I remembered Tifanny and my mom and how I have future and I realized I can't let them take my life away. But is she as strong as I am? I decided that I needed to do something about it. Eric needs to be put in jail. And then I would have to tell the cops about Adam. And all this would be done one step at a time. Starting with Chase. I have to tell him at some point if I want him to help me. It would just have to be sooner rather than later. Because who knows how many girls lives are at stake? I can't keep that guilt on me. I need to do something about him. But for now, I'm celebrating Chase's spot into our schools football team with two people I love: Tifanny and Chase. And yes I do love Chase. But as a friend. I never thought he would be, but he is. Chase Mathew is my best friend.