Unforgettable whispers

chapter #18

You sat on the balcony lost in thought. You were confused. And you had every right to be. Why is it he holds me close and kisses my hair, yet never tells me he has actual feelings for me? Why is it he smiles when I walk through the door, yet never reaches out to pull me into a hug? Why is it that he draws me on scraps of paper, yet never shows any real sign of any lasting affection? These were the thoughts coursing through your brain. Holding you captive in a trance, as you watched the sun slowly move higher in the sky.

Your heavy thoughts were broken by the tall glass door sliding open. Natasha stepped up beside you and leaned her arms on the rail, flipping her red hair to the side and sighing as the sun hit her skin. It was silent. Neither of you need words to understand each other. It was nice having another female in the tower. You didn't feel so alone. Or completely surrounded by six, hard headed men. You didn't try to suppress the sigh that escaped your lips as you closed your eyes in the warmth. Your peace was broken by Natasha's silky voice speaking to you.

"You know, taking a run might loosen up any heavy thoughts. It works for me," she remarked, tilting her head slightly towards you.

"I can always count on you knowing what's up," you quipped.

"You're not that hard to read. At least for me," she replied casually.

"I like to think I am."

"Keep telling yourself that."

"I will."

Natasha turned and headed towards the door.

"You know, if you ever want company, all you need to do is ask," she said, pausing for a moment.

"Thanks, Nat. I'll keep that in mind," you said, sending her a warm smile.

You decided to run.

As the evening cooled, drug yourself from your warm bath, and head towards the living room. The Avengers were scattered around the giant tower, so you didn't see anyone as you entered the kitchen. You sighed as you took in the plates scattered across the counter. Stacking them, you placed them in the sink. As you wiped the counter down, a silky voice behind you made you jump.

"I thought Stark had machines for everything. Apparently I was wrong."

"Ah! Loki! Don't sneak up like that," you huffed.

"I'm sorry. It's what I do, love," he answered calmly.

"Okay stop calling me that!" you shouted, frustrated.

"I'm sorry... I suppose I shall try and refrain from calling you that, love," Loki answered cheekily.

"Ugh go away!" you crossly stormed off, "you're so frustrating!" you threw over your shoulder. Loki nearly choked in surprise.

"What's wrong with her?" he muttered. Turning he followed you, "hey, hey, hey. What's the matter, darling?"

"You're what's the matter!" you replied, pushing him off you.

"Hey, why don't you calm down and we can talk this out. Okay, love?" he reasoned.

"I don't want to talk it out! Go away!" you shouted, folding your arms against your chest and turning away. When there was no reply, you turned. He had disappeared.

"Lovers quarrel?" Thor asked, walking up beside you.

"We're not lovers," you mumbled.

"Would you like to talk about it?" Thor asked.

"He's just so confusing!" you blurted out, "Like I know he is the God Of Mischief and all, but doesn't he know that I'm perplexed with how he treats me?!" you said angrily. Thor listened, nodding his head slowly.

"Are you saying that he is playing too many tricks on you?" Thor asked innocently.

"Ugh no! I'm saying that if he has feelings for me, he has to tell me and not just string me along on his little game," you explained exasperatingly.

"Ah I understand now," he said, nodding knowingly, "maybe I will talk to him. I'm sure he will tell you before he returns to Asgard," he mused. You nodded, before whipping around, letting the words sink in.

"He..he's going back to Asgard?" you gasped.

"Yes," Thor said, his brow furrowing, "did he not inform you?"

"No, he missed that minor detail in our last conversation," you glumly replied.

Loki heard his door open. No knock. That meant only one person.

"You're going back to Asgard?" you asked dejectedly. He sighed, knowing you would have found out sooner or later.

"Yes. I would've told you sooner but I couldn't find the words," he responded. You stood by the door, arms folded over your chest. Your eyes downcast.

"I..I mean...I guess I knew it was bound to happen sooner of later, but I didn't think this soon," your eyes stayed locked on the wooden floor.

"Yes, I didn't expect it to be so soon either," he pointed out. You glanced awkwardly around the room. Looking everywhere but his eyes, which you knew were searching your face for some sort of emotional reply.

"How soon are you going?" you asked timidly.

"We leave for Asgard in two days' time." you nodded. Your heart sinks even lower than it already was.

"Okay," you were able to squeak out before turning away and leaving. You walked as fast as you could down the corridor. Desperately hoping Loki hadn't followed you.

When you reached Natasha's room, you barged right in, forgetting to knock.

"Nat?" Natasha looked up from where she was writing. She saw tears swimming in your eyes.

"Aw honey, what's wrong?" she asked, walking over to you.

"Loki's leaving," you managed to get out, before the tears slipped out and came rolling down your cheeks.

Oh honey," she comforted as she gathered you into a hug, "you want to talk about it?" you shook your head. Natasha brought you over to sit on her bed, before wrapping her arms around you again. She hugged you for a minute, before pushing you out to arms length.

"Hey. I'm not saying it doesn't hurt, but don't cry over some guy..I mean god. It's not worth it. I'm sure if he cares for you, he'll say so and come back." you nodded, before wiping your red eyes.

"Thanks, Nat. I can always count on you," you smiled tearfully.