RESISTANCE - Why do bad things happen to good people?

Law of Innocence

"I'm in the best phase of my life!"

At least, that's what those high school and preparatory course teachers say. It is a way to encourage students to pass the entrance exam. It is also good advertising for schools.

The idea easily convinces any freshman looking for a future, parties, dating, group of friends, etc.

Anyway, here I am to discover the true meaning of this sentence.

March 2005.

My first day at the largest university in the country.

The feeling of being here is that of accomplishment, after hours and hours with books and exercise handouts.

When I got the news - I was admitted in the last acceptance list - I felt like the most powerful guy on earth.

That guy who wanted so badly to leave the countryside. I couldn't take that quiet, calm life anymore.

I wanted to live in São Paulo, the largest city in the country, the city that I only knew on TV. I was fascinated by modern, radiant buildings. Pure gigantism.

I only had one concern: can I even afford to live alone?

Either I stayed in the comfort of my parents' house or I took a risk. I would spend my life frustrated if I didn't try.

If it didn't work, my mother had already given me the solution:

"Come back!"

I don't know how to cook, but I will learn. Now, washing dishes must be boring ...

What about washing and cleaning the house then? Bathroom, kitchen, sinks... It must be a pain.

My mother never taught me. I never did any of that. Washing clothes is the easiest part. Throw the clothes in the washer and you're done. Now, ironing clothes will be a struggle.

Messing up is easy. Tidying up is difficult. Maybe I would hire a cleaning lady. Obviously, I would give up when I knew the price.

How naïve of me!

The routine of an engineering student is overloaded, with no time for anything. Imagine doing all of that. But I would have to get by.

Here, in a city with more than ten million inhabitants, you can feel more alone than in a small country town.

Some adapt and are a little lucky. Others end up with panic syndrome, depression, among other traumas.

Rent here is absurd. The reference point is the subway. The closer, the more expensive.

I came from a city with just over twenty thousand inhabitants. My father had some land and the largest machine shop in the city was his. I had a nice car and a nice house.

I obviously did nothing. I just studied. And even without a license, I would take his car to go around and get a little attention.

So, everyone knew me. They were all my friends. I was popular in the city and it did me good.

But here, the city destroys this hierarchical order. Here I am nobody.

My dad's big car is nothing around here. Nobody knows me.

I would discover that dream and reality are very distant things. Pollution, messy traffic, stressed people. It was everything I didn't want. And to win I would need someone.

I have this characteristic. It is a strong need. I need someone to encourage me to do and conquer things.

I can't do anything alone. I need a push, a strong one.