Cttro
Day 1
Another tear escaped in my eyes when I feel lonely again. I was crying silently inside of this room. Hindi ko na mabilang kung ilang beses na akong umiyak ngayon. Whenever I think of my home, I would end up crying insanely.
Walang oras na hindi ko iniisip si Yaya Clear. I really miss her. Siguradong nag-alala na rin siya sa kakahanap sa akin. Bente quatro oras na rin ako nawawala sa amin. I badly need her hug and her comfort. Mababaliw na siguro ako kapag hindi ko siya kasama ngayon. Wala akong kilala dito at natatakot akong makita sila.
I am an introverted person and asocial. Tanging si Yaya Clear lang talaga ang sandalan ko kapag nakakaramdam ako ng takot sa tao. Ngayon na wala siya sa tabi ko, hindi ko na rin alam kung anong gagawin. I was so dependent to her that I couldn't stand on my own. I am so weak.
Akala ko mamatay na ako kahapon. Miraculously, she didn't came back to kill me. Hinayaan niya lang ako makulong dito sa madilim na silid na ito hanggang sa makatulog ako. The next morning ay may pumasok na mga tauhan niya sa kuwarto ko. They all wear their uniform neatly. Akala ko kung ano na ang gagawin nila sa akin pero inayusan lang pala nila ako at pinaligo. Nilinis din nila ang buong silid at saka ako iniwan ulit. 'Feels like by any minute, magkakaroon ako ng anxiety dito. This huge house was surrounded by a lifeless atmosphere. Parang akong nasa tahimik na lugar ng impiyerno na pinamumunuan ni Chaeyoung.
I was sitting quietly at the fountain tiers. Maraming bagay ang bumabagabag sa isipan ko. I was wondering, why do they still keep me alive if they're going to kill me at the end of the day? What's the prolong of my death? Ano ba ang plano nila sa akin? Hindi naman sa gusto ko agad mamatay. Gusto ko lang malaman kung ano ang mangyayari sa akin sa susunod.
Ang pinagtataka ko lang, bakit hinahayaan pa nila akong gawin kung ano gusto ko. Ano ba talaga ako rito? Bihag o bisita? Kagaya na lang ngayon, nakatambay lang ako dito at hindi man lang nila ako sinisita sa mga ginagawa ko. Maraming nakabantay sa akin pero wala man lang sila ginagawa. Mukhang mas kinakabahan pa ako sa ganitong ikinikilos nila kaysa isipin kung kailan ako mamatay. I think I am going to lose my mind.
"May court ba kayo rito?"I asked them.
They're all obviously looked hesitant to answer my question because they keep giving each other an exchange look. It makes me wonder what they are thinking. I kind a regret my decision to ask them, not until one of them volunteered.
I know her. She's one of those guards who pretended that they're doing work and minding their own business, kuno. Nakita ko siya kanina na nagkukunwari na naglilinis ng bintana ng bahay. Nahuli ko pa siyang nakamasid sa akin. Sumuko na siguro sa pagpapanggap dahil hindi naman ganoon ang trabaho niya. With my good instinct, I think it is easy for me to see who it is and to know who is who.
She smiled shyly at me. "Opo, Miss mina."She paused. "Bakit? Naglalaro po kayo? "she asked.
Kilala nila kung sino ako, that's why they're acting like that. Chaeyoung must have told them everything about me and even my family.
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