With You

Eight

CLAIRE:

Walking between the two of them, we slowly made our way to the location of my next class. The bell signaling the end of the 1st period didn't ring yet, so I was able to enjoy the empty hallways. Reaching our destination, the bell rang and people immediately bustled out of different classrooms. Within seconds the previous empty hallway was filled with people. Hiding myself between Elly and the wall, I didn't move. "I really have to go now sweetheart. I'll see you in less than an hour okay?", Sam said as Elly slowly began moving us into the empty classroom.

Elly led me to the back of the classroom, nudging me to sit next to the window and taking a seat right next to me. People started to slowly pour in and I immediately averted my gaze, focusing on the pattern of my summer dress instead. Within minutes the classroom was buzzing with activity and I was exponentially getting more and more anxious. Elly gently nudged my side, reminding me to focus on my breathing. When he nudged me the second time, I looked at him confused, "say here or raise your hand now", he urged me. Confused by his request I finally looked up and saw the teacher and some of the students expectedly watching me. Not trusting my voice, I quickly raised my hand. Only after the teacher nodded did I realize that he was taking roll call. I don't know how long ago the class started, what was said, or what class I was even sitting in. I was completely clueless to my surroundings. I had no idea what was going on. I was mindlessly tracing patterns on my legs with my trembling finger. The odd motion made me fully concentrate on my breathing, matching it to the pattern I was tracing.

Finally Elly nudged me for the 3rd time and I reluctantly looked up at him, "you did it!", he excitedly whisper yelled. Bewildered by his actions, yet again, I looked around the classroom. Some of the people were still making their way out of the class, some were throwing curious glances in our direction, but Sam stood in front of me, effectively blocking me away from them. When did he get here? I thought. "Is it over?", I asked in disbelief.

"You did it!", Elly exclaimed louder, patting my shoulder with excessive force. Trying to ignore the growing pain I immediately felt, I focused on the situation instead. "I did it", I whispered in shock more to myself than to them. "You did it sweetheart", Sam confirmed. "I did it!", I squealed, bouncing my hands up and down in excitement.

With my entire body and mind still recovering from shock, I let them lead me to my next class. Again keeping my head down, I moved closer to Elly, trying to ignore the loud conversations surrounding us. Reaching the classroom, I once again did not dare to look up, instead I focused on Elly's back as he lead me to the back of the classroom. Suddenly, Sam stepped in front of Elly, "out", he quietly ordered to someone and I heard the scraping of a chair and shuffling of feet.

Bewildered by the situation, I wanted to look up and see what was going on. But even with my eyes strategically focusing on the desk, I was still painfully aware of the stares addressed in our direction. My whole body was on edge and my cheeks began to flush. "Turn around", Sam instructed in the same stern tone as before, enunciating each word slowly and dangerously quiet. Trying to gauge the situation, I raised my eyes for a quick scan of the room. No one was looking in our direction and I sighed with relief. At one point during class, Sam took my hand and gently picked it up, silently guiding me to raise my hand for another roll call.

Just sitting in class was slowly draining me out of energy. I was still painfully focused on my breathing while trying to prevent my body from being hyper aware of everything. Coupled with the absolutely no sleep I got last night and the emotional whirl - wheel I was currently experiencing, I was surprised by how I was able to hold myself together. Suddenly I felt being pulled up to my feet and escorted out of the classroom. As I found myself in the hallway again, the bustling of the people and the buzzing that accompanied them suddenly everything appeared in slow motion. I felt myself being dragged onto the courtyard and nudged to take a seat on one of the metal chairs.