Crying Lighting (Hotch x Reader)// ✔

14. The Fucking Best

Summary:

You receive an unexpected visit at home -

Notes:

(pls dont hate me for this chapter lmao)

Fluff and some angst ahead (sry) lol

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It takes a long phone call with Jack – about his friends, the toys at the kindergarten, stuffed animals and even nothing – for Hotch to unwind from the two days, seemingly stretching out with no end in sight. His son's voice and laughter were like the sun, bringing light back into his life at the end of his bleak days, and especially after over-drawn cases like this one had been.

Hotch hates to admit – not when he now associates Haley's voice to pain and his own shortcomings, feeling like the failed husband and father that he strongly believes he is – but even her voice brings him a familiar sense of peace as she picks up the phone.

Even if the minutes talking with her are brief. A simple, short explanation that he needs to hear Jack's voice. And she understands right away – this particular case he's solved has been difficult and draining. He misses that more than anything. Having someone know his intentions without having to voice them aloud. And that sense of peace he's come to relate to his ex-wife rapidly shifts to ache again.

The kind of ache that makes him want to stick around the office afterhours and overload himself with work without interruption, until his fingers are numb from writing, and his eyes dry from staring at papers. It's the one that makes him refuse to sleep early, or be left alone with his thoughts. It's what he deserves – he thinks. After all, he did choose his work over his family. Over the relationship with his wife – whom he still loves.

Hotch doesn't explain the new sleeping situation to any of them. He simply calls Garcia, asking her to do something outside her line of work – call hotels and motels near the police department, and book rooms for them all for the night. They're all too tired either way to question the sudden change.

Everyone apart from Dave – obviously. He walks inside Hotch's office wordlessly, looking around the walls and the furniture as if he's fascinated with the interior design of Seattle PD. Meanwhile, Hotch packs his stuff a bit too loudly and aggressively, letting out his frustrations in childish ways. Dave's silence sends him over the edge. He drops his suitcase over the table, looking up at the other man.

"What is it, Dave?" He inhales deeply, preparing himself emotionally for what his friend will throw at him this time.

"We're sleeping in a motel tonight?"

Hotch wants to laugh because Dave's at least being brutally honest this time – putting his own comfort first.

"It's closer to the PD" he answers calmly, hint of amusement in his words. "You'd have to settle for below-average sleeping conditions tonight"

"Closer" Dave draws out. "That's incredibly efficient for our work"

Hotch narrows his eyes, "Yes"

"I thought we were past disagreements" he says, reading something from Hotch's micro-expressions.

"What disagreements?"

Instead of answering, Dave sits down on the chair before his desk.

"The team has been walking on eggshells ever since you got divorced, Aaron. Don't misunderstand me – I'm not saying you're being difficult but you said so yourself -"

"What?"

"That the team shares everything."

"Everyone knows about the divorce-"