SHAPES UNSPOKEN

-1-

HAPPY READING 🥰

Sean Britto

I dial her number and waited for a response.

"Hello, Sean is everything alright with Steph," Cindy answers and it feels good to hear her voice.

"It's so good to hear your voice, I miss you, baby," I say.

"Sean are you hearing me."

"I'm hearing you just find. Steph is doing alright. Cindy, I was promoted earlier today."

"Do you know what time it is Sean? Is that why you called. I thought we talked about this."

"Baby your the first person I thought to call after I received the news. Why do you have that tone? Cindy what exactly is it, tell me, baby. Is there someone else?"

"Sean don't you dare go there."

"What the hell is it then, make me understand all this. I just don't get it," I ask with frustration in my voice.

"See, this is exactly what is it. I said I don't want you to call me unless it's about Steph and yet you're here calling me at this hour. You are smothering me and I need space."

"Space to do what exactly Cindy."

"Sean, space to be me. To be whole again. Please understand even I am trying to figure things out."

"What is there to figure out?"

"Sean congratulations on your promotion you deserve it."

"That's all you're going to say."

"What else is there to say. Look at what you have accomplished, please give me a chance to do so as well."

"I've never stopped you from a career Cindy."

"No, but you think I don't need one."

"I told you I can take care and provide for my family."

"Sean, I'm tired of having the same argument with you."

"Ok, ok I see. I will file for a divorce. then I can stop suffocating you and we don't even have to talk. You will have all the space you want and need to as you please."

"Sean--"

"You're miles away damn it and still need space. I'm simply calling to share my good news with you but I guess it's not good enough. I'm not good enough for you Cindy? You're my wife for crying out loud."

"Sean, it's not like that. Please just give me some time, it's all I asks."

"Some time for what?"

Silent

"Cindy time for what? don't you love me anymore?"

"Sean, I don't know, maybe to find myself. To understand all of this. To know where my heart is. Sean, I just don't know and I need some time. Maybe for us to stop fighting like this, it isn't good for either of us."

"Baby let's do it together. Let me be here for you and our family."

"I want to do this on my own. I could be wrong but what if it's right also. Please give me some space and stop smothering me."

"I'm suffocating you, Cindy."

"Sean I will always love you."

"What good is that now. This suffocation is out of your way as of today. I will get my lawyer on it as soon as possible. Enjoy your life, Cindy. Good luck in your career."

"Sean--"

I cut the call, pelting my phone to the wall shattering it. I screamed out for all the pain and overwhelming frustration I am feeling. I am angry now. I devoted myself to her, giving her all of me and now I'm suffocating her. For seven good fucking years of my life. I can't understand this my wife walking out on me and wants me to understand it. How do I get through one night much more a lifetime? What kind of life would this be. My son without his mother, me without my companion and friend. We build this life together now she doesn't want it and I can't understand it. The more I think about it the more furious it makes me.

I'm tired of the fights and all we seem to do when we talk is argue. I'm not even sure if it's called talking what we do.

I slump to the floor a tear runs down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly. I'm done with this, I'm through pinning after her. She made her decision now I'm making mine, I'm angry now.

I went online order a new phone and email my lawyer. I fill him in on what's going on and told him to draft the papers immediately. I gave him Cindy's email and her current address. She can have the house and car I bought her. I'm moving on and I'm done with her.

I went up to the bedroom rip all the covers and pillowcases off the bed. I clear the nightstand, chest of drawers, and medicine cabinet of all her belongings. I'm done with this until I can find a place this will have to do.

I walk back downstairs, went to the bar pouring a shot of whiskey, I place a few ice cubes sit back on my recliner sipping my drink ever so slowly, Reckoning.

At age 29 I don't have my shit together. My wife left me, my son is in another state and I can't seem to focus on anything except for Cindy. "When will this" I point to my heart. "Stop hurting and needing her," There is no answer. No one's here to answer me and it hurt even more. I pour all the liquor in my mouth walking back to the bar pouring another shot and walking back to my recliner with the bottle of whiskey.

After about an hour of feeling sorry for myself and ten shots in, I am feeling nice. It didn't hurt so bad. I lay back putting my hands behind my head and for the first time, I didn't feel lonely and think of her.

I thought of my promotion and how good it made me felt earlier. I smile "I'm a partner in one of the largest Architecture business moguls in the country, plus a seat on the board." I chuckle to myself.

Who would've thought a simple, skinny little black boy growing up in Texas with my ma and pa would be here today. Persevering in my ambition and never giving up.

As soon as I receive my new phone, I have to call my parents, to give them the good news. With this promotion, I will buy them a new house with self-contained rooms and all the works. They have a pretty decent home but I will upgrade them.

They worked hard sending my brother and me to school now they deserve the best. As much as I can give.

In my first week of work, I will sort out everything and get an agent on it.

After my interview with Mr Chesney four years ago. He offered me the position right away, being the first landscaper for the company who knew it would have reached this far. Now I'm a partner, me Sean Ueyandre Britto.

My hard work paid off, now I have this to be thankful for, every though my personal life is currently trash, I have something to smile about and to push through for. The two best things in my life right now are my son and my career.

My mind keeps racing back to my marriage no matter how I will my mind to stop. I'm wondering what I did to make it go wrong. I don't blame Cindy for being ambitious but I would have helped in making whatever goals she had come through. I know how it felt when I got the call; that I have been hired by Chestney Smith. I understand her desire to work but I don't understand her wanting to do it without me. I wanted everything with her and still do if she will have me.

It took me years to work my way to where I am in my life, she was there working alongside me helping me, didn't I make her feel appreciated? For all she did by my side. Didn't I love her enough? Why didn't I see this coming? she left and take away everything. This house is no longer a home. My heart is no longer whole. My family is broken and I'm shattered.

This I must admit is not the way I saw us going to the future.