Little Drabbles

Idiot.

"Fucking hell.."

"Why are you such an idiot.."

Andy spoke to himself, looking down at the grave at his feet. It's about 13 years old at this point, the moss and dirt was caking it and some fake flower petals have fallen to cover a bit of the stone.

"Who..who fucking raised you..t-to be so fucking dumb." He balled his fist while tears came to his eyes.

June 24th.

That was the date on one side of the tombstone.

It was also the current date.

It was an anniversary of sorts.
One that Andrew ultimately caused.

One he knew he'd be known for, but not one he thought would be permanently engraved in his self conscious.

To answer his questions?

He did. He raised her. He's the one who taught her to stand up for and protect those who were less capable.
Just like how he's the one who put her in the ground for such heroics.

"God-FUCKING DAMN IT ADDIE!"  He hugged himself.

Every year was like this.

Every year, since he got out of jail, he'd come back to this grave and reread the name on the stone about a million times.

Relive the day a about a million times.

He'd remember packing the gun.

Setting off a fire alarm to cause panic.

Screaming and shooting blindly into the crowd.

He'd remember hearing her scream and realizing she had come to school that day.

She saw him.

And her last thoughts of him were that of wanting to protect those he wished to hurt.
Her last grand idea was jumping infront of his aim and taking a bullet to her lung.

The ringing in his ears when everyone tried to rush her away.

It didn't stop until long after he was driven away by the cops.

The ringing came back during court. When the judge was presenting his crimes to him and instead of victimless attack he was greeted with the crime of Manslaughter.

Many of his bullets had missed and remained just as aimless as he sent them. But the one that didn't took out the one person he spent so long trying to protect.

He stayed still. Looking down at the grave and letting tears fall from his eyes, cursing to himself. At himself.
In this moment he called Her an idiot.

He asked who raised her. Who told her to get involved. Who in their right mind thought it was okay.

All these questions weren't really for her though.

He knew ultimately the reason she was gone.

He knew ultimately that if he hadn't been such an idiot he wouldn't be here today. He'd still be able to hug her.

Maybe even help her through college..

But that was impossible now.

Because he was an idiot..