Stories For the Damned

Alexanders - Ch 4

To pass the time I took the gun apart and put it together again over and over. Analyzing each part of it, each detail. I noted how the color of the wood on the stock was worn. I thought about how it could've used a new coat of varnish. I also noticed how Chase had etched her initials into the barrel. The simple 'C. A.' making the rifle hers.

I was taking it apart for the twenty-sixth time when I heard someone clear their throat. 

Spooked, I turned around quickly and was met by Chase rubbing the back of her neck with a still tired expression on her face. I relaxed a bit as she went and sat beside me, saying nothing.

She must've been really tired because she rested her head on my shoulder as if we hadn't been fighting hours earlier.

"You okay?" I asked her. She yawned and nodded softly. I also sighed, I'll admit I was no longer mad at her, in fact, it felt kind of good to have her beside me. "I'm sorry," I whispered.

It took her a moment to respond. "Me too."

"I uh, I know you mean well but you've gotta...you have to..." I paused, not knowing what to say. "Do you...you care right?"

"Care?"

"Yeah. I uh, you saved me. You left me and then you saved me and I- I don't know. It's confusing."

"Confusing..." she parroted.

"Yes. I love you, Chase, I do-" She tensed beside me but I continued. "-I don't know if you really want-"

"Sarah," she cut me off as if she was afraid of what I might say, of what it might mean.

We both didn't say anything for a while but she still remained against me, albeit clearly not as relaxed as before.

Though her saying my name signaled that the conversation was over, I still thought about it. I needed to know how she really felt.

"Can we talk about it?" I said quietly.

She sighed before sitting up and holding out her hand for the gun. "No."

I searched her blue eyes for some sort of....anything. But all I found was her avoiding anything I might say so I finally gave in and quickly put the gun back together before handing it to her.

"Good night," I said softly before standing and heading off to sleep.

~~~

I woke the next morning, facing the canopy of leaves flooding the sky above me. The sound of soft chatter made me realize I was a part of a group now. So, I sat up, stretching before standing and slowly making my way to the campfire.

Chase sat in the same spot I left her the night before, cradling the gun. This time she had a coffee cup in hand, taking slow sips, staring into the flames.

"Sarah," Sadie said once she saw me, having caught me staring at Chase. "Oh uh, Charles and I were talking we- could I speak to you?" I nodded, the thought of them kicking me out of the group after being here for such a short time made me nervous. Was I and Chase fighting too much?

I glanced at Charles but he of course, just gave me a straight face with no hints whatsoever. Swallowing my nervousness, I followed Sadie out just past the camp.

Once we were a good distance away she started talking while taking the lead.

"Saw you looking at Chase, you two made up yet?"

"Yeah."

"Okay...well, I was speaking with Charles-"

'Fuck', I thought. This was it, I braced for the fatal news.

"-Me and him both think it's best that we get you a gun and a horse."

What? "Oh," I said with a smile, feeling glad, no, relieved that she wasn't kicking me out.

"Oh?"

"Oh, no, no, I just thought you would be kicking me out after..."

"Your fight with Chase?"

"Yeah..."

Sadie chuckled. "She'd kill me if I told you to leave." I was about to object when she cut in. "She would. Trust me. Plus, you two are just working it out."

"Working it out? Right now it feels like she wants nothing to do with me."

"Yes, working it out. I and Jake were like that at first, before I finally admitted how I felt."

I hummed in understanding.

"Anyways, Valentine should be just southwest of here. We'll stop there, get you geared up, and then continue down to tumbleweed. That alright?"

"Thanks, Sadie, y'know, for everything."

"Hm, it's not me you should be thanking," she said and looked back at the camp. I knew who she was talking about. She gave me a pat on the shoulder before saying, "You'll work it out," and heading back to camp.