TFATWS X READER

Breaking the news

Your POV

They approached me after having the conversation with Hill. I wonder what they could have been talking about honestly. Are they going to take me away and make me into a SHIELD agent  or something? I don't know. 

"How do we even tell this to her?" Sam questioned James.

"Tell what exactly?" I crossed my arms.

"In a formal term, you are now under our legal custody until you are 18" Sam stated.

"In other words, we are technically your parents" James looked at me.

I raised my eyebrows in confusion.

What?

It took me awhile to let that information sink into my head.

"Yeah I know, its alot" Sam pressed his lips.

"It definitely is" I agreed, still confused.

"But you're alright with this are you? With us being your guardian?" Sam asked.

Are you kidding? I'm not complaining. Sam and James are both amazing and good people and I trust them. I wouldn't have it any other way.

And I know for a fact they will play the role of a guardian much better than my actual parents.

"I don't have a problem with it at all" I looked at them.

"Its been a long day, let's go grab something to eat. I know a place" James rested his hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah, I don't know about you guys but I am hungry as hell" Sam said dramatically.

I chuckled. "Yeah sure, why not. We're always stuck at HQ anyways"

We got into the car and headed to the place James suggested.

James sat behind with me this time.

"Hey" He looked at me.

"If I didn't grab your hand earlier, would you have engaged?"

I pressed my lips, and proceeded to sigh.

"I--, I don't know. My mind took over me, it was possible that I might have" I shook my head.

"You know sometimes I'm afraid. Afraid that one day I might not be able to control my emotions. I don't want to hurt anyone, especially you, and Sam. And ny fear is one day I do"

"I don't fully understand my powers. But I know what it's capable off. It feeds off my emotions. The more rage or pain I'm in, the stronger it gets and I feel that it slowly take over me" I closed my eyes.

"(Y/N), I need you to know one thing. You're strong, and I believe you are strong enough to not allow your powers to get to the better of you. And the both of us, we will help you in ways we can, no matter how impossible it may seem"

I nodded.

"Thanks, James. And thank you, for earlier. Things could have gone worse"

He shook his head. "Don't thank me, please"

I smiled and rested my head, and took a deep breath.

Seeing my parents earlier was difficult, I just want a peace of mind. But I know that's impossible.

Every goddamn second of the day my mind is occupied with flashes of memories. Bitter memories. The things HYDRA did to me are permanently locked in my mind. I can't escape it, and its eating me up. I'm exhausted.

"We're here" Sam parked the car right across the place.

We got down and I looked around.

Its not often I get to see the real world, so I try to take it all in.

We sat down at the seats by the window and ordered what we wanted.

I took a cup of coffee and an appetizer. Wasn't exactly in the mood for anything heavy.

We were all in our own world most of the time, had a few small conversations. Mostly was silence, but a comfortable one. 

I would have never pictured this. Me sitting in a coffee shop with two avengers. 

To be exact, I never pictured a life outside HYDRA. I did had the determination to get out from there, but it definitely died down as days passed. But to be fair, I never imagined myself at HYDRA in the first place. Yes, I never had the best relationship with my parents but to think that they did this to me just proves how many things that seems impossible to be possible. 

To even think that the younger me had dreams, actual dreams in life. To grow and be successful and get the hell out of my parents place. Well the second part technically did happen but not the way I wanted to of course. 

My chance of life was taken away from me by the people who gave it to me in the first place. And I will never be able to forgive them, they ruined my life. A fifteen year old kid who was put into trauma and torture. 

I glanced at James. 

Honestly if he was not there, I don't think I would have survived. He gave me hope when there was literally none. Made sure that I was alright, and tried to put a smile on my face to make me forget where I was, even if it was for a split second. 

I know what he's been through, he shared that with me. And he doesn't deserve to have gone through what he did. And that's the same way he thinks of me. 

He made me to look at the better side no matter how impossible at was, and he still is. And I don't feel deserving of it. He doesn't have to do all this, he can just leave and let Hill take me, and I won't be his problem anymore. But he didn't. 

I finished the remaining of my coffee as I let my thoughts wander.