It’s the first day since X Factor finished and the boys already have interviews and management meetings and that type of things so it’s another early morning for them. I left the boys to have time to their selves last night so when I got up today it was 10:20, I needed that sleep in and then I rang Jayden to ask what his plans were. He didn’t answer, okay I thought he is probably at a meeting so I went off and chilled out for a while. He then rang me back after an hour or so saying they just finished having a meeting with Sony and they are now signed. My heart was racing all I could think was, wow that was fast? I was honestly so happy for them, then Jayden said that their winners single, Surrender, was going to be released. Yeah....was not expecting that one!
“Babe, we are having a quick lunch stop in the city. Come with?” He said. “Well yeah, like I’m going to turn down an offer to lunch with you and the boys” I joked. Since it was such short notice I put on a nice casual dress with some flats and grabbed my bags and went.
About now it was 1ish and I was at the place Jayden told me to meet them, I waited, waited, waited until probably 1:30 and they still didn’t show up. So I rang Jayden.......no answer. Strange I thought, didn’t know what was wrong, where they were, if they were okay or anything. I knew I couldn’t stress myself out so I tried to stay calm and got some lunch then went home.
At 6:45pm I finally got a call back.....
Jayden – Wow babe, finally home. Such a busy day getting as much as we could done. Why did you ring?
Me – Wow babe, where were you when you said to meet up for lunch?
Jayden – I’m sorry, change of plans
Me – So you couldn’t even ring or text your girlfriend to say that? ( I don’t think it took much for him to figure out I was not happy)
Jayden – Since when did you get all clingy? I said I was sorry babe!!!
Me – Clingy? Are you serious? You’re the one who asked ME to meet you for lunch. How am I clingy though? What, I got scared when you didn’t show up and got annoyed that you, my boyfriend, didn’t even text me to say that there was a change of plans?
Jayden – I can’t even handle your moodiness right now, we NEED a break. This relationship is getting too much too soon!
Me – FINE then if that’s what you want?
Jayden – Tha...thats is what I want! (I could hear him start to choke up)
Me – Whatever, bye....
My heart sank, my breathing became faster, my stomach started to knot up and I couldn’t hold the tears in any longer. That was our first fight and I don’t know if we are done or not. What does “NEED a break” mean? All these thoughts running through my mind. I’m crying, could I have really stuffed up the best thing in my life? I can’t believe I just let go of the conversation so easily, I usually fight for the things and people I love. What is wrong with me? Why did I do that? I swear I could feel my heart breaking in half, I still couldn’t believe it. I didn’t know if I should text back or leave it for the night or ring him, I was just so confused now. I text my girl Sarah to come over, thankfully she wasn’t busy and she did. When she arrived she could tell wasn’t well and I have been crying so we talked and cried and talked about it all. She gave me the biggest hug, reminded me of Jayden’s hugs, and was the hug I gave Jayden last night the last one? Anyway she said to text him back, it was better than ringing because we wouldn’t have to reply straight away and we can think about what to say.
Me – I’m so sorry babe, I love you xoxo <3
I texted him first, we anxiously waited for a text back but Sarah knew she had to get my mind off it. We put on Pitch Perfect, grabbed some food and went in bed. 5 minutes went past and I’ll look at my phone *Nothing* another 10 then 15 then 30 minutes *Nothing* I started getting super worried again, I just needed one text that was all, one text back but Pitch Perfect was finished and no text. Sarah said everything will be fine, to not stress and that we needed the sleep. So we said goodnight, turned off the lights and went to sleep BUT *dingggg* my phone went off just as I was about to close my eyes.
Jayden – Goodnight x.
Just “Goodnight x.” What did that mean? Are we over? Sarah said get some sleep and ring him tomorrow so as hard as it was I put down my phone, shut my eyes and went to sleep. Not knowing if I was single and if I ruined everything between Jayden and I.
