what should've been

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i died two novembers ago

at 4:30 on a wednesday morning

i took so many pills

but not enough

i fell asleep, not knowing if i'd wake up

and when i did, my stomach hurt

and my mother thought i was pretending to be sick

she had no clue what had taken place on my bedroom floor

i lived

i was breathing

but i will never be the same

i died two novembers ago

or at least i should have

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