Built for Sin - Jean Kirstein x Reader

Chapter 4: Rewind

!!TRIGGER WARNING!! MENTIONS OF DEATH AND DEPRESSION!! ALSO, JUST OUTRIGHT SAD!!

3rd Person PoV

Y/n went back to the cabins early that day, claiming sickness. Technically it was true. She wasn't exactly okay mentally. She walked into the empty cabins, taking a deep breath. She exhaled, not knowing what was happening. Her knees buckled and she fell to the floor, sobbing lightly. She couldn't steady her breathing. The h/c girl held out a hand to observe her shakiness. She then closed her eyes tightly, letting the tears flow as intrusive thoughts filled her head. 'What would my dad think of me now..' 'I'm so weak.' 'Why me..?'

//Flashback//

Y/n was about 6 years old, her father was in his late 20's, near early thirties. Her mother died at childbirth, but her father never blamed her, for she was the last he had of her. 

"Daddy, why did mommy go when I came here?" Y/f/n (your father's name) took the young girl's small hands in his. 

"Your mother didn't have a choice.. God took her to heaven, you see." His eyes turned glossy with unshed tears. This made his young daughter sniffle. 

"Why didn't God let her stay?"

At this, his tears fell. I mean, how could he explain to a child that the woman he loved most is no longer? He shut his eyes tight and breathed out a breathy but sad laugh. 

"Daddy?" He opened his eyes. "Why are you laughing Daddy?" 

He touched his wet face with his right hand's fingers, collecting the salty water with his fingertips. 

// timeskip, you're now 9 years old //

"Daddy, I'm hungry.." The young girl rubbed her aching stomach in an attempt to sooth her hunger.

"I know sweetheart.. Here.." The dark haired man stood up from his sitting position on the two seater sofa. Disappearing behind a wall, he came back in a few seconds, a bread roll in hand. He then gave it to his daughter. 

"This is all we have.. Here Y/n." He smiled at his daughter. She couldn't tell at the moment, but regret and sadness filled his eyes. Every day she looks more and more like her mother. 

"But.. but that's yours Daddy," He smiled at her sadly. 

"You need to eat darling." She shook her tiny head and pulled the roll in half, giving him the slightly bigger half. 

"But Daddy's need to eat too, right?" Y/n beamed at him before taking a small bite out of her half. His daughter was so kind to him.. 

//Timeskip, you're 11//

"Dad, I'm home.. Managed to snag a few vegetables and some bread-" Y/n's eyes widened in pure horror. "DAD!"

She rushed to her father. His abdomen was bleeding, he wasn't moving. Before she panicked more thought, 'I have to see if he's alive..' Her knees buckled. 'Check if he's alive? He's Dad, of course he is.. Right?'

She heard a light gargle of a cough. Her eyes widened.

"DAD! Dad don't leave me, please you can't leave me too," she cried over him, trying her best to stop his bleeding. His bloody hand found its way to her face. 

"You look just like your mother right now.." He wiped one of her tears weakly, leaving a small blood stain on her cheek. She leaned into his touch, for this was the last she'd ever feel it. She let her tears fall. She couldn't hold them anymore. (shit this is making me cry just writing it😭).