Only Us (Am I Normal Yet? Continuation)

Chapter 2

AN: Hope you enjoyed the last chapter! Here's the next one :)

So I did the breathing exercises that Sarah taught me. It helped a bit and my Good, Rational Thoughts came back.

Good Thought
None of that is true. You are on full medication and they told you some Bad Thoughts may be a side- effect. You need to do your exercises, Oli is too polite not to message you back. You're not a terrible person, you just have a lot going on.

And then.. He messaged me back.

Hi Evie,
Today was okay. Thank you for messaging. I appreciate it. It's okay that you didn't do all those things. You probably had issues of your own. Or I just screwed it up. I knew you were too good for me. Because I'm so weird and you're not. You're beautiful and smart and intense. And I really liked you, you know? But I messed it all up like I always do. I want to go out with you but I'll mess it up again and you'll never like me because I'm such a loser. And yeah I would love to. When?
-Oli

I felt so awful and guilty because Oli is one of the sweetest and most shy people I know and I should have held his hand and told him about me and maybe we would have kissed and everything would be okay. But I didn't. So I just replied. I tried to make things better.

Oli,
Maybe Saturday? You are not a loser. You are really sweet and you're the kindest boy I've ever met. It's okay that you find it difficult to go out. That must be really hard. It's okay if your parents want to come to check on you. I really like you, okay? And it's hard for me to not mess it up. I should have reacted differently and held your hand or hugged you and told you about what's wrong with me. That's unfair sorry. Anyway, I'll see you on Saturday?
-Evie xx

See you on Saturday- Oli x

~Time Skip to Saturday, brought to you by my awful writing lmao~

BAD THOUGHT
You need to wash your hands again. They're going to get really sweaty. You also need to touch the lamp post on the way there, three times for good luck.

It hit me like a punch to the stomach. But I did my breathing exercises and tried to stay calm.

Good Thought
You've already washed your hands, you don't need to wash them again. You're not sweating. You don't need to touch the lamp posts- they will be dirty.

After I decided on the fifth outfit I had tried on, I set off to meet Oli at the coffee shop. As soon as I reached the shop, I could see him through the window. He looked nervous as anything. His foot was tapping on the floor, making the entire table shake. I didn't blame him being nervous, this must be a big step. Especially after our last date.