𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐆𝐋𝐎𝐖, rini

une

AFTERGLOW
chapter one

🕊

okay ouch. that fucking hurt. is the first thing that popped into one nina or preferably called nini salazar robert's mind after she had bolted out of the scene in front of her. it was a spur of moment thing, and if she had been crazy enough she would've waltzed into the room breaking whatever moment ricky and gina has shared. but she's never been that bold, so she did what she would usually do, she ran away from the situation.

is this how ricky felt whenever he saw her with ej?

she feels like this is karma coming back to bite her in the ass. she wouldn't admit it out loud, of course. because she's that stubborn and she does not want to admit defeat, at least just yet. and now a storm of emotions is clouding her mind ; anger, bitterness, jealousy, pain, and sadness. her pessimistic and toxic mind trying to shift the blame to ricky and gina.

she shook her head at those emotions. no. she doesn't have a real reason to have these feelings. gina didn't do anything wrong, at least in this situation. ricky well . . . he fucked up at some of the parts, but they were broken up for good. he's not hers to claim so she didn't have a valid reason to feel this way.

"—nini! earth to nini?"

props to kourtney for bringing her back to reality.

nini blinked at the sight of her best friend. "uh, yeah, um, sorry what are we talking about?"

"well for the most part it was just me talking about the new euphoria episode and you giving me the most driest responses so," kourtney said while giving her that look. a look that nini is already all too familiar with.

"oh, yeah, uh, sorry kourts,"

"mhmm, now wanna tell me what the fuck is going on with you?"

nini stood up abruptly. "what? no, kourts everything is fine,"

"you know for someone who wants to be an actor, you're terrible at lying just to be clear." nini rolled her eyes at that statement.

"besides, something is clearly eating you up in the inside since you've been picking on your nails from the moment we got here."

nini pressed her lips into a thin line as she made her way around her room. she didn't know what to say, or more like she didn't know exactly how to reach the conversation. it's not something that she can just easily talk about with no worry whatsoever. because this is about ricky. and nothing is ever easy when it comes to talking about ricky.

kourtney was looking at her like that. with the whole 'i know you're keeping something from me and i will find out and might possibly judge you for your stupid actions' demeanor. because that's how kourtney is, she's the one who keeps nini grounded.

after a long agonizing moment of silence, kourtney let out a sigh as she stood up from nini's bed. "look if you're not gonna spill then i might as well—"

"—i saw ricky serenading someone else!"

nini's breath hitched as she finally looks kourtney in the eye. ". . . okay, are you sure that he wasn't like— singing it to miss jenn or big red for practice or something?"

nini nodded. "positive, it was girl. he serenaded a song to another girl."

"am i ever gonna know who this girl is?"

nini shrugged. "i mean it doesn't matter right? like it doesn't mean anything right? ricky's not mine, he can go serenaded whatever girl he wants."

kourtney pursed her lips. "if it doesn't mean anything, then why are you so bothered by it?"

"what? no! i'm not bothered by it!" she was in fact, bothered by it. hence her defensive attitude.

kourtney scoffed. "yeah right. look at yourself! you've been picking your nails, getting all quiet, zoning out completely, and now getting defensive. you're bothered by it neens, you're just too fucking stubborn to admit it."

"okay ouch kourts, that was harsh,"

"tough love. look girl, i love you but sometimes i need to whack you on the side of your head for you to see shit clearly. it's harsh but if it's the truth then what else is there to say."

kourtney looked at nini expectantly, hoping she would say something but sadly no words came out of the petite brunette's lips. kourtney sighed dejectedly, shaking her head as she picked up her belongings and head for the door.

nini stared at her feet. not knowing what to say, and so she preferred to stay quiet rather than say something stupid once again. kourtney turned around, her back against the door with her hand placed on the door knob.

"look just, call me when you've already figured out whatever the hell it is you're being in denial about, okay? love you, see you tomorrow."

"love you." nini murmured.

with one last tired smile, kourtney made her way back to her own house leaving nini alone with her mind. her pessimistic toxic insecure mind. nini flopped onto her bed with a groan of annoyance. she cannot believe that this is where her life has gotten too. everything, it all used to be so easy. so what went wrong? what happened? how did it come to this?

nini turned over to her right side, facing her bedside table that has framed pictures of people she hold dear to her heart. her moms, her lola, kourtney, and ricky. ricky fucking bowen with his stupid curly hair and stupid dreamy brown eyes and that stupid dopey smile. she wants to hate him so bad, after everything that happened, as selfish as it sounds she wants to, she really wants to. but she can't, that wouldn't be fair. to him or to her.

nini could only wish she was able to bang her head against the wall right now, she decided not to do so because her moms would ask too many questions. questions that she does not want to answer nor if she's able to answer them at all.

why are you so bothered by it?

kourtney's question loomed or at this point more like haunted her mind. well, why is she so bothered by it then? she said before and she'll say it again, ricky's not hers anymore, he can go serenade other girls if he wants to because nini isn't his girlfriend anymore. nini isn't even sure if they're still the same friends they used to be before they got into a romantic relationship. and somehow that thought bothers her, a lot.

"fuck you ricky bowen." nini whispered before closing her eyes and falling into dark abyss.