Got your back

Chapter 17

A few weeks later

Jay leaned against the wall in a narrow hallway in headquarters. Across from him was Hailey, sitting in the lone chair outside of the room where she would shortly be forced to answer question after question about what she went through. The whole team had had to give their side of what had happened. Their depositions had been spread out over the course of the week, with one each day so as to prevent the entire unit from ever having to be completely out of service. Hailey was the last to go. Whether they were just trying to get all of the facts first or if they were intentionally trying to make everything worse by dragging out the process for her, it was hard to say. But no one would put the latter past them.

Voight had given Jay the afternoon off without him even having to ask, knowing that he would want to be with Hailey. He couldn't be in the room as she was testifying, but nothing could stop him from being there for her every other possible second.

He watched her sitting there, trying her best to ignore her nerves. He was doing his best to not let her see his own nerves because the last thing she needed was something to make her worry more. He wanted to support her, not make it any worse. But he was beginning to see why she hadn't wanted to report it. Because if he'd realized anything over the past couple days, it was that as soon as she went in that room it would be her on trial. Not Caden. Her.

Jay walked into the locker room and found Adam unbuttoning his blue uniform shirt. "Hey man, how'd it go?"

Adam shook his head, an anxious look on his face. "They asked a lot of questions about when Hailey and I were dating. I just- I didn't know if I should warn her about it but I figured you should know."

Jay swore and ran a hand through his hair. So that's how this investigation was going to go. He shook his head. "No, she's got enough to worry about. Let's not add this to it as well." Adam nodded. "But thanks for the heads up," Jay added with a sigh.

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The next day, Jay had his own deposition. He had expected the hearing to be quick since he hadn't actually been there for the worst of it. But he quickly realized he was wrong. Instead, after just a few questions about the harassment Hailey had been subjected to, focus transitioned to their relationship. He mentally made a reminder to thank Adam for the warning, but that was shortly forgotten as the questions kept coming. He felt like the suspects he was used to facing on the other side of the table in interrogation. He wasn't even a party in this investigation, just a witness, but somehow he felt like he was the one on trial. As he continued to answer the barrage of unnecessary and irrelevant questions, he couldn't help but dread how much worse it was going to be for Hailey.

As he looked at Hailey now, he could see that she'd known all along that this is how it would be. She looked smaller than normal in her blue dress uniform. Instead of bringing out the brightness of her blue eyes as it usually did, this time it just brought his attention to the shadows underneath them. She had kept telling him the nightmares were gone but he knew better. Or maybe they were really gone, but if so it was only because she was no longer sleeping. Without outright calling her on the lie, he tried to do everything he could to make it better, frequently suggesting they stay in and watch a movie instead of going out. Almost every time she ended up asleep against his chest. He was just glad he could make her feel safe, even if only for a few hours.

The door next to Hailey opened. "Detective Upton? We're ready for you."

As Hailey stood up, she shot Jay a nervous look. He hated to see her this way. She always tried to hide her emotions, so her showing fear in public, even if just to him, was a testament to just how bad this whole situation was.

He returned her gaze with a supportive look. He thought he saw a flicker of relief pass over her face, but then she entered the room and the door quickly shut behind her. Now there was nothing he could do but wait.

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Much later, the door finally opened, and he shot up from the chair. Hailey walked out. Her face was pale and a few flyaways were rebelling from her bun but otherwise she looked okay.

"How'd it go?"

She shook her head. "Basically, they did everything short of actually asking what I was wearing. Although a part of me wishes they did so I could remind them that CPD was the one that bought it," she said, her voice breaking slightly. She let out a dry laugh, the kind that Jay knew accompanied her trying to fight back tears and trying to hide how close she was to breaking down. He pulled her in for a hug, but she pulled away, looking extremely uncomfortable.

Jay silently cursed himself for being so insensitive. Here she was just having finished essentially getting slut shamed- partly because of him- by the people who should be on her side, and he was acting like he didn't care.

He stepped back so he was at a respectable, professional distance. He could tell by her eyes that she was worried that she'd hurt him. He shot her a thin smile to assure her that she hadn't, and she could read in his eyes that he was sorry for making her uncomfortable. With the way that they could read each other easier than an open book, words between them weren't necessary. Even so, Jay vocalized what he wanted to tell her. "We're good, Hails." We're always going to be good. He left that part unspoken, but he knew she was thinking it as well. She nodded and let out a shaky breath as they started walking toward the elevator.

As soon as the doors closed, Hailey couldn't keep it together any longer. At the first sound of her crying, Jay pulled her close and this time she didn't resist. They stayed like that for most of the elevator ride, Jay letting her cry and Hailey fighting to get her tears under control. By the time they'd reached the first floor, she'd managed to stop crying, but she was still dangerously close. She pulled away from Jay as the elevator dinged and the doors began to open. She quickly wiped the remnants of any tears from her face. If he hadn't known better, Jay would never have guessed that she'd been crying. Her eyes were slightly redder than normal, but not noticeably so, nothing that couldn't pass for allergies or a cold. As he followed her off the elevator, Jay shook his head. It never ceased to amaze him how well his partner could put on a brave face. He hated that she still felt that she had to, but her ability to hide her emotions was impressive.

It wasn't until they were in the parking lot that they spoke again. As they were walking up to the truck, Jay broke their silence. "How about we stop at Greek Islands and pick up something for dinner? And then we could watch the Blackhawks game back at my place," he suggested.

"I'd like that," Hailey said, smiling at the mention of her favorite restaurant, as Jay had hoped she would. Hopefully this would help cheer her up, even if only a little.