𝗦𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗮𝗹 🤍

•𝗙𝗶𝘅𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗗𝗮𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗲•

•💧•

Nikki's POV, September 3rd 1989

With Doc gone and having booted Brandi I've been thinking long and hard on devising a plan to get Vince back... a couple of weeks later and I sort of have one. I needed to sort this shit out and now, I'd managed so far to not give in to the temptation of smack, I was quite proud of the fact I'd held off for this long but I knew I couldn't do it forever.

The voice was beginning to win and I didn't want to fall back into addiction, I couldn't... it'd had already killed me twice, I don't think I'd survive a third- I didn't exactly wanna put that to the test either.

Fixing the damage I've caused is going to take a while but I want to make a start, and just try and get Vinnie to understand I meant none of the last year... none of it was ever meant to happen.

Talking though wasn't going to be enough I don't think... my previous attempts have been shot down in flames, I needed something to give him to try and show I do truly care about him... I care about him more than anyone or anything else.

I've tried romantic shit before but I've never done forgiveness before... is it the same thing or not? I don't think it is which is why I'm totally clueless... do I go with what I know and do it kinda romantic or will that make everything worse?

I honestly don't even know at this point, it's driving me crazy.

I'd spent the last few days trying to come up with things I could do but nothing seems satisfactory, by now I'd given up and just decided to go with something plain and simple, I've just brought Vince a box of chocolates and some flowers, corny? Maybe. But I didn't know what else to do, I was a desperate man so this will have to do.

At this exact moment I was sat in my car at the end of Vince's driveway debating whether to drive up or turn back... I was scared he was going to reject me again... I know I hurt him and this is a defence mechanism of sorts but he's not listening to me... he thinks I was leading him on or something like that, he's got it all wrong and it's after talking recently to Mick just how much Vince has taken this out of context and began to see that our entire relationship was fake.

He's trying to rationalize what I did and that kills me because there isn't a rational explanation, I wasn't being rational... I'm so deeply in love with him- I couldn't fake that, I don't have the ability to fake that, Vin's special- how I am with him is exclusively for him, I couldn't be how I am with him for anyone else.

After sitting here tapping my finger off the steering wheel for an embarrassing amount of time I suddenly put my foot on the accelerator and began to drive further up the all familiar driveway up to Vin's house, I had to do this. I had to try and explain myself even if I don't fully understand what the fuck happened either.

Soon Vince's seemingly new black Ferrari came into view, sat in-front of the garage... I hadn't been here in a long time... it felt alien, I also felt unwelcome, he's not going to be happy to see me, that much I knew but there's no going back.

I pulled up and shut off my engine, sighing to myself and running over possible conversation starters, quickly realizing that they won't do anything for me so I just drop them from my thoughts. My hand reached down to the passenger footwell and grabbed the chocolates and flowers opening the car door once they were in my hand and getting out of the car, locking it up behind me, putting the car keys in my jacket pocket then very slowly making my way towards Vince's front door.