Never have I ever

I can't breathe

Jordans P.O.V

"Jordan!"

"Jordan !,Jordan! wakeup !"

"please" 

 I kept hearing these words but I couldn't move to act to it , as I started to think , my eyes were opening and I could see I was in a hospital bed 

"Michelle I didn't do it " I exclaimed , she placed her finger on my lip and said "Shh , I know , don't worry about it "

"Are you okay ?" she questioned with a rub on my cheek , I then sat up with Michelle's help and sat down forward, for some reason I had the urge to cry , so I start crying "Michelle  , I don't know anymore "she wiped the tear  off my eye , 

"I didn't do it !"I shouted as I hit my pillow and started screaming , I felt hurt, I then got off the  bed with my Iv tubes dangling on the floor  and gave Michelle a stern look  "If God loves me why do he make me suffer !?, huh?!" "Jor-" Michelle said before I cut her  off 

"Where's God in all this pain !" i screamed and  pushed the glass

"Jordan, God gives his strongest warriors the hardest battles " Michelle exclaimed  "Michelle, I could go to jail if they don't  find who did it and your here ! saying silly quotes "he proclaimed "There not silly quotes they  have meaning "

"If God is really  then why am I bipolar ?, why do I have mad this disorder ?, what loving God would let me go through that ?! huh?"I questioned 

"God breaks you to make you , when my mom died , I became a drug addict , I was into all the perks  , I was so depressed , I tried to kill myself 3 times ,my dad started to loose hope over my life ,I was just some christian girl who was raised from a christian home , weeks after Troy got shot , from here I hate God so much , but God's grace changed my life , what makes you think he can't change yours? "Michelle said 

Michelle P.o.v

his stern face was shocked 

I said , with tears flowing from my eyes , "That doesn't change the fact that Amaria's on an hospital bed pregnant with a baby , she's to young to have , if God can do anything and forgive anything why is all this happening !?"he said as a tear dropped form his eye , I could see the rage in his eyes 

"God has a plan for ever thing !when Troy got shot , I thought my brother was gonna die because the doctors said he would but he didn't , listen  we don't see a bright future for what has happen but God does , Job in the Bible lost all his children , land , properties , riches all, he  became helpless and poor from this , his wife and his friends told him to curse God but he didn't because he had faith in what God's plan was and he got twice as much as he had "

I explained 

"But I have curse God , I hurt you and others , I disregarded him for most part of my life , why would God love me ?" he questioned 

I proclaimed "Thats what Jesus came to die for , he became sin so we could be forgiven , he gave himself so we could have eternal life , God said accept Jesus as your savior and you will inherit eternal life"

"how do I , do that ?"he questioned "Believe -"I mumbled 

I then gave him A big hug and said softly behind to his ear "God has plan for you but not to harm but to prosper you "