Blood & Lust

Chapter 8

I sat in my bed, pondering the things to come, and unconsciously began to rub the belly containing my unborn child, my own body felt so foreign to me. I was growing fast which was expected because this wasn’t an ordinary child. I wobbled to the bathroom and stood in the mirror. The thought of having a child frightens me, because I could escape the thought that I could possibly be harboring a monster, all the books we’ve looked into all said the child would feed off our energy and the deepest desires of our hearts would be born in flesh. Deep down I did not want this child, deep down I did not love its father, deep down I just wanted to run away, ever since Christian died there had been an empty pain in my chest, something was missing now, something that could never be obtained once again, he was forever gone from the world I dwelled in. I began to choke on the tears I fought so hard to hold back, I wobbled back to my bed and laid down on my side, burying my face in the pillow, I glanced at the clock reading the blurry time of 7:30pm I began to cry myself to sleep.

I awoke floating in space, nothing but pure white for as far as I can see, it felt so cold and so alone, and I began to cry.

Don’t cry, a voice urged

I looked up and a little bright light was before me, I began to wipe my tears. Who are you? What are you? I questioned.

You know who I am; the voice seemed to ring out. I am apart of you, don’t cry mommy things will be perfectly fine I promise.

I cuddled this little ball of white light, such warmth and it was all mine, what was my mind thinking, how could I think the way I thought, I must be strong, the battle ahead could be a long hard one, but I now have the hope to make it by.

I snuck into her room late that night, I watched her toss and turn in her sleep, and she slept like a child. Her dangerous red hair sprawled around her in such a heavenly way, I twirled a lock around my fingers and watched her smooth peaceful expression, and I got up and blew out the room hoping not to wake her. Back in my room I stood in my bathroom staring into my haggard reflection, I began to think about her, in two months she resembled a woman into her sixth month of pregnancy, she was growing fast and it was nothing I could do to slow it down, we had approximately one more month until she gave birth. Until what may be the last time I ever saw her, I had to find a way to save her while developing back a relationship with her, I messed up things in such a horrible way. I undressed and took a shower washing away the filth that had accumulated over time, my hair had grown to be rather shaggy almost scruffy looking, I pondered cutting it but decided against it, maybe she would like it, I thought to myself. Shaking my head to myself, it’s going to take more than looks to get her back old man. I quickly secured a white t-shirt and some black Nike sweat pants and ran to see our mother, the queen. She had to know about what was going on by now, her silence I was about to break.

I entered the main room where she sat atop her throne, her head thrown back over one arm and her legs over the other arm, her long body length platinum hair sprawled across the floor and down the throne steps, her grey eyes misty and lost like a soon to be storm brewing.

Mother, I questioned

Her eyes returned to their wakened state and in the most graceful manor she sat up in her chair and her eyes found mine and held my gaze captive, it was a reason she was queen, her power was unmatched.

I’m sure you know about what’s been unfolding around her, I questioned

Yes, she stated plainly

Why you have remained so silent, I asked

She took in a deep breath and looked at me. You know that I am old, she asked

Yes but aren’t we all.