(29) I need you

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Jungkook's POV

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Jungkook's POV

Realising why I am anxious is not a magic pill, I still feel it. Yet at least then I have seen the cage and can start finding the door and the key. It's a start.

Taehyungie and me are happy to know that we are going to be parents. It has been really a beautiful journey with him by my side and I hope this stays forever. After we found about my pregnancy Taehyungie immediately proposed me and I of course said yes.

Yet there is something I feel anxious about, Taehyungie is an idol. He wants to hold a press conference to share the news with his fans but I don't want everyone to know. It's too soon.

Maybe I am just scared, maybe I am not but there is this one thing I know. I don't want the world to know yet. It might ruin his career, it might put my little baby at risk and I don't want that.

"Hyung please try to understand"

"What should I try to understand when you are not making any sense"

"I just don't want them to know. Big deal"

"Yes it is a big deal Jungkook. Why do you wanna even hide it. I wanna proudly show it to the world that I am getting married and I am gonna be a father, Love you know I feel so lucky to have you in my life and I want everyone to know how happy you make me just by your presence" I felt myself melting at his words but I had to be strong.

"I know Taehyungie and I am so damn lucky to have you in my life as well but try to understand me please"

"Why don't you understand bun? You think it will be easy to have a secret marriage, how is it even possible to hide our child baby. I really am not understanding you right now"

"This conversation is really making me stressed and nothing more" I said with a sigh as I sat down on the couch.

If stress is coffee in a cup, and if the cup spills you are overwhelmed and sick, then it makes sense to put a lid on that cup. This is managing your life, choosing wisely what you can and can't cope with. This way we keep an open heart and see that we are doing the most we can do whilst remaining in good health.

One way I put a lid on my cup is not to watch the news, to talk with those who bring a sense of love into my life. We can make choices to care for the self and still be kind. You can care better for others from strength than weakness and you can always keep your sense of duty to others as your moral compass, as the reason you come back to help even at the expense of your own comfort. It's a prudence with integrity that awaits the right moment to be brave.

"Baby just don't stress please" Taehyungie said and sat down beside me.

Taehyung's POV

When a mother is stressed, brain function gets decreased in the infant even by two months old. This alteration of the brain harms the ability of the child to be a happy person who is a member of a functional complex society. The stress also changes the expression of over 900 genes for a shorter life in a competitive (rather than a cooperative) society.

So, for the future, for peace, the first gift we must give to every newborn baby is an unstressed mother and if hiding our relationship is what I can do to keep both of my babies safe, then I will do.

If Jungkookie isn't comfortable with people knowing about us, about our family. I will do everything I can just to make my babies happy, it doesn't matter if he doesn't want this then this won't happen.

I love him more than myself and I need him the most, not the stardom, not the fame, not the fans. I just need him and our little baby.

"You know it will be hard, right?" I asked and he looked at him.

"I know and I will do everything I can for you two" He replied and I smiled.

"All I want is your happiness bun. I Need You, so I will do whatever you want" I answered.

"Really hyungie?" He smiled at me and I nod my head.

He squealed and hugged me tightly, I hugged him back with a small smile.

'If this is what you want bun'

________________________________
See you all in the next chapter.
I hope you liked it.💜
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Keep supporting.
And if there are any mistakes I am sorry for that.
Stay safe and stay happy.💜💜

(A/n: This was just a sneak peak of the past so that the previous chapter would be clear to all of you. All doubts and stuff, I hope everything is gone now)

 All doubts and stuff, I hope everything is gone now)

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Seriously 😌😌

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