From the Desk of Draco Malfoy

Chapter 6

Tuesday, October 6th

Last night was a fucking disaster. It started out ok, considering the circumstances. Blaise, Theo, and Pansy insisted on coming out with me. I told Theo that Granger had been coming out once in a while but I think they're worried I'm spending too much time alone. When Blaise grabbed some wood for a fire I realized they intended to stay so I told them Granger might be coming. Pansy pulled a bottle out of her bag and cracked it open. I don't think she believed me until Granger actually showed up.

She almost ran, I saw it on her face before she pulled her wand. She was second guessing every peaceful moment we had spent together. I think it was Pansy being there that startled her, she has been around Blaise and Theo enough to know they're harmless, but Pansy is a bitch.

Granger didn't say much at first, just kind of zoned out into the fire. I would have forgotten she was there if I didn't have to brush her hand every time she passed the bottle to me. Also why the hell is Theo so interested in Grangers love life? Why does it matter if she was interested in anyone? And Pansy's comment about me counting when Blaise mentioned riding a dragon. She's going on the list too. Actually her spilling about my stupid crush from third year has her placed at the top of my kill list. The way Granger laughed though, I still don't know if it pissed me off or not.

I saw Granger's scar. I don't know what I expected but I didn't think it would be that clear. She didn't say anything when I pulled her arm over. I don't know why I was just picturing a jagged mark on her arm. I knew Bella carved that word into her, I just couldn't picture it being scarred into her forever. Thinking about it makes me want to throw up. Maybe that's why I danced with her.

I fucking danced with her. I was drunk, but still. What the actual fuck was I thinking? Just because the witch said she wanted to waltz that didn't mean I had to jump up and show her how to. And for a second there, I wanted to kiss her and I think she would have let me. She was drunk though, the few sips she would take at the lake did nothing to prepare her for actually drinking with us. She doesn't drink much so I know she was drunk. She would never have looked at me like that sober.

Pansy fucking noticed that I was going to kiss her. She hasn't mentioned it yet but she's been watching me all day, like she was waiting for me to slip and show her a sign that I'm into Granger. I'm not though. Into Granger, that is. I've let her get too close though, I can't have other people noticing. I mean, there's nothing to actually notice but the rumor mill here is vicious. The last thing I need is other people talking about me having a fucking crush on Granger.

Gods, I can't believe I almost kissed her.