The Five

CHAPTER 10

Verbatim

"Emi? You okay?" Jishaku was sitting on the floor, outside on the large balcony. He would go there when he needed peace and comfort. Itami had seen him troubled over dinner, so he decided that after eating he would follow Jishaku to speak with him.

Jishaku cringed at his dead name, his back was facing Itami, Itami closed the door behind him. He walked closer to him, Jishaku heard soft steps getting closer to him.

"Can you not call me that? Please..." Jishaku's voice was tired, the five of them would usually be tired after training and studying. But somehow his voice was tired in a depressed way. Itami clicked his tongue "Why? It's your name" he sat down at Jishaku's side.

"Itami, you're the first person I would say this to" Jishaku was looking down at the ground, his voice slightly muffled since his arms and legs covered half his head. "What is it?" Itami worried slightly, what could be so bad for him to feel so depressed?

"I am not a girl, I am a boy. I was assigned the wrong gender" his mouth curled in a pout as he Felt the urge to cry. Itami was in awe, he didn't know how to react, however he was devoted to listen. Jishaku continued "I am transgender and my name is Jishaku" he finally let out a sob, "Am I a disappointment?" He covered his face with his hands.

Itami immediately wrapped him in a warm and proud embrace "No, you're not, don't even think you are" Itami rubbed his back, "You can be whoever you want to be, as long as you're happy" Jishaku continued to sob, his face buried in Itami's dark blue sweater.

"Jishaku...I'm so proud of you" he placed a hand in Jishaku's head and played with his short blonde hair while he cried. "You know we will always support you" Itami's voice was calm and smooth.

From all the things Itami could do, what he did best was comfort anyone. Especially the people he cared for. He would hold Sosa whenever she had panic attacks. He would comb Mika's hair and add a ribbon to it. He would recommend fantasy books to Maindorido since she read so much. He would make tea when Jishaku couldn't sleep.

He was like their big brother, he knew all the things about them. What worried them, what made them excited.

"Itami...You don't deserve hell" Jishaku tilted his head up so his words would be understandable. "What do you mean, Jishaku?" Itami's eyes were closed, he was enjoying having Jishaku in his arms.

"You deserve so much better," Jishaku added. From his room, Jishaku had taken a pocket knife. "You are so good to us" he sneakily reached into his pocket to find the small sharp knife. Itami didn't notice "I do all I do because I care for you" a proud smile on his face.

"Thank you" Jishaku teared their hug apart, he held one of Itami's arms, his yellow eyes looking at Itami's light turquoise ones.

"You deserve much more than you get" he caressed Itami's palm, he grabbed the knife with force and placed it so it played patiently in Itami's forearm, "Jishaku...what are you doing?" his voice was shaking. Itami tried not to move, he figured that if he did, he would get hurt. 

"Jishaku stop!" A begging Tone to his voice "Itami...I am saving you from the shit of this world" tears rose upon Jishaku's eyes.

"Jishaku, please stop! I don't want to Hurt you!" His eyebrows curled in worry, they had signed a contract that prohibited them from using their abilities against each other. Itami could easily insert pain in Jishaku to make him back off.

So he tried his best to not hurt Jishaku in a way that would kill him. He gave him a pounding headache. Hoping it would distract him.

Yet it didn't.