Unrequited Love

Chapter 8

Crying uncontrollably, sent Carlisle into a panic. He didn't know what to do. He wasn't sure if he should hold her or let her be. He wasn't sure if he wanted to do any of those things either. Carlisle did all he could to make himself numb to emotions and now standing in front of him is the woman he has been wanting and yearning for months on end. The woman he had hurt and watched walk out of his life. The woman he had lied to about his feelings for her. The woman he wanted then and now. "May I hold you?" His voice so ginger and sweet caressed her ears. She wanted to yell leave me alone, but somehow, the words wouldn't come. Her crying was doing all the talking for her. With a nod in her eyes, Gina told Carlisle he could hold her. She wanted to feel his arms around her so badly that her body ached. Without a second thought, Carlisle moved in and wrapped his medium-built arms around her. As she came into him and lay on his chest, she could feel his warmth enveloping her body. Within an instant, Gina could feel herself give in to Carlisle. Sensing her movement, Carlisle felt his yearning for her deepen.

 Moments after she rested her head on his chest, he used his hand to lift her face just to look into her eyes. The eyes that always beckoned to him; the eyes that always told him that he is the only man in her world; the eyes that always made him feel the comfort he yearns for when he needs it. At that moment, Carlisle realized that the love he has for this woman was bigger than he was, and he needed her in his life. Opening his mouth to speak his heart Carlisle immediately felt a tightening in his throat and the words he was about to say to this woman would not come forth. He tried again, and nothing came. Baffled by his current situation, he just continued to stare at her tear-stained face. Deciding to try again, the same thing happened. Carlisle now realized that the time he had spent all his life making himself numb and emotionally stagnant was now taking effect more than any other time. Moreover, this was the time that he needed to break away. He couldn't lose her again.

Gina looked at Carlisle's face and its contortion seemed to be saying something to her. Something she was not able to figure out. Then she heard through an exasperating sigh, "I am sorry." That was the last thing that Gina wanted to hear. "What exactly are you sorry for?""Everything," with that, Carlisle removed himself from her grasp and stood away from her. Looking at her from a distance, Carlisle was still not able to form the words and say what he wanted to say. "Is it ok if I leave you now?"His question pierced Gina so hard that all that came out of her was "Ok". As she watched Carlisle's back going through the door, her thoughts began scolding her once again. What the hell is wrong with you? Are you fucking insane? Did you actually believe that he had changed? Did you actually believe that he wanted you now? Tears do not move hearts like that honey. Now get your shit together. For real this time. 

Walking over to the mirror, Gina used the water to wash her face, and all the time she washed, the tears kept coming. Taking a few deep breaths, Gina gathered her thoughts and began towards the door. As she re-entered the restaurant, it felt as if she was entering a new world. She felt so broken and angry all at the same time. As she passed their table she motioned Travis without looking at him that she was leaving. Receiving the signal, Travis got up and began walking with her. Reaching the outdoors, the air attacked her face. Her face suddenly began to chill. Gina began to walk absentmindedly back to her office.

                                                                                                ****There comes a time in everyone's life when someone or something affects him or her when that someone or something changes who they were and who they could have been, when that someone or something makes them who they are. There will be a time in your life when the person you love is either not ready to love you the way you do them or not ready to love you at all. As she walked out of the restaurant, Carlisle looked after her until she was out of sight. Returning his fragmented attention to the woman, he was sitting with Carlisle's thoughts took over and all the while he could only think about Gina.