Don't leave me //Until we meet again Fanfiction

Chapter 4

Hey,

hope you are doing well :)

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I woke up, breathing fast. Sweat ran down my skin and my body was shaking. It took me some time until I calmed down and was able to stay up. This was the third time I woke up from a nightmare this night. I went over to the kitchenette, looking to the digitale clock on the oven. Half past three. I wouldn't try to fall back asleep again. I wouldn't fall asleep again anyways. So I decided to take a long shower and to learn before I would make my way to school.

I waited in the cafeteria for Pharm and the others. This morning I made my way to school pretty early but I couldn't have staid in my dorm any longer. I just felt... so lonely there. So the cafeteria was a much better place for me. Some other students - I never regonized them before - sat in the back, talking quietly. And another group of female students sat next to a tree, enjoying the sun in the morning. I looked around when I spotted someone walking to me happily. 

"Good morning, Manow", I greeted her when she plopped herself next to me on the bench. 

"Good morning. Woah, you look tired? Are you okay?", she asked, her face getting serious. I nodded, rubbing the back of my neck. 

"Yeah, don't worry. How was your weekend."

She accepted the change of subject without any protest and started to tell me how hard it was to learn for the english test. She sounded really sad but out of nowhere her mood changed and she started to tell me about the sleepover she enjoyed with a few friends this saturday. I didn't mean to sound rude but she was perfectly made for the drama-club. Soon enough Team joined us. He also mentioned that I looked pretty tired but didn't ask any questions.

"Good morning", Wins voice sounded behind us happily. With an elegant move he sat down on the bench across of us and put his bag on his lap.

"I heard you will write an English test today, so I brang something to motivate you", he kept talking. He opened his bag and revealed some packs of crisps. With a smile he handed us the lays and smirked when he gave one pack to Team.

"Thank you, P'Win", I said already opening the bag of crips. I didn't eat any breakfast this morning so I was pretty hungry.

"Hey", Pharm greeted, when he and Dean took a seat. He looked at me for a second, raising his brows but didn't say anything. Quietly he took the bag of crisps Win handed him and turned to Manow when she started to talk to him. 

After the English test Manow and Team seemed much more relaxed. Only Pharm seemed ... weird. Normally he had these vibes which make me feel super comfortable but today he seemed to be ... worried. He didn't talk to me much. Did I do something wrong? But I didn't dare to ask him. Probably I was totally wrong and he would just blame myself. But when I thought he wouldn't have any chat with me this day, he mumbled: "What's wrong with you today? You don't seem to be in a good shape." 

We were back in the cafeteria, eating lunch. I looked at him for a second, then I faced my noodles again. 

"I am just tired. Didn't get much sleep last night", I responded quietly.

"Probably you should go home and rest", he suggested. 

"No, it's fine." I couldn't sleep anyways. But I kept this to myself.

"Are you sure? I could ask Dean to give you a free day. I don't think it's a good idea to join the training", he kept talking, still looking at me.

"Don't worry, Pharm. It's fine. I can rest after the training", I answered, taking the last bite of my lunch and stood up then. 

"I gotta go to the bathroom. See you in class", I said then and left. I didn't mean to be bad or to act like an ass but I didn't wanna talk about the nightmares, which haunted me since my childhood. I thought these times were over but this weekend I struggled with the bad dreams again. But it was nothing to worry about. Perhaps I was just stressed. 

After the break I went to the classroom. I had to apologize to Pharm for being so rude. I didn't wanna mess up this friendship. When I entered the class, Pharm already sat on his seat. I made my way to our seats, plopped on the chair next to him and whispered: "I am sorry, Pharm. I didn't mean to leave you alone."

The brown haired turned to me and gave me a encouraging smile. 

"Don't worry, Alex, it's fine. It was my fault. You didn't want to talk about and I pushed you. I am sorry.", he answered and patted my shoulder, "Let's forget about it."  

I was totally fine with that. Immediatly I felt much better and a way more comfortable. 

I hurried to the swimming hall, already late. I talked to Manow and somehow I forgot about the time. When I entered the hall, I apologized and was on my way to the bathing cabin, when I heard Deans voice.

"Alex, come here", he said in his strict voice. I paused and slowly went back to him.

"I am sorry. I am too late", I apologized looking up to him.

"It's fine, don't worry. It's just... I think you shouldn't join the training today. You seem to be pretty tired and I don't think I can let you go in the water", he said with crossed arms, his look getting soft. I looked at him for a few second without saying a word. I didn't see him the whole day. How can he already... .

"Pharm told you to send me home, didn't he", I asked, sounding more pissed than I had planned.

"Yes. He texted me that you didn't seem to be in a good ship. He was worried you would get sick. And I think he isn't wrong. Please, Alex, go home and rest", Dean said kinda worried.

I really wanted to swim. Wanted the distraction. But I understood that Pharm and Dean were worried. He slowly nodded.

"Alright. Then I will leave now. Thank you, Captain", I said with a bow and slowly made my way back to the entrance. I felt Teams gaze on me but didn't turn back. Probably I could go home and rest now. At least a bit.

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