Beyond The Fury

Chapter Fourteen

(Song- Right Here by Chase Atlantic)
————
Hardin's POV

Ivory heaves a sigh and her eyes fall closed as she nods her head slowly,"Okay..." she steps aside, allowing the door to open wide enough for me to slip into her apartment. I look around and my vision becomes clearer as the effects of the alcohol begin to slowly ware off.

A vase is shattered on the floor and a large damp spot covers the wall. Weltered flowers lay shrivelled on the ground and I gulp harshly. Her and I seem to have a similar temper.. mines worse than hers of course.

"What's with the vase?" I gesture to the broken porcelain on the floor. She sniffles softly before answering, "Oh.. it's nothing."

Oh no. Oh fucking no. This is such a disaster. She is closing herself off from me. No more playful teasing or remarks. No more heated moments. I want to see her loving eyes and her caring smile but there is just.. nothing..

I have to fix this. Or at least try.

"Listen.. you have seen it yourself. What I do.. I'm not proud of it. I never have been and if only you knew the reason why then maybe you would stop looking at me that way."

"And how exactly am I looking at you?" She snaps immediately after I am finished talking.

"Like.. like you hate me." I fire back, my mouth bites shut and my jaw tenses.

"I don't hate you, Hardin. I promise I don't.. it just hurts to be so close to you right now." She admits and my breathing becomes rapid. I am such a idiot.

"Tell me.." her voice is softer now, much quieter. Like she is pleading for me to give her a reason to forgive me, "Tell me the reason why."

This is so stupid. Moronic. She doesn't need to know, all she has to know is that what I'm doing- all the wrong and all the chaos is to protect someone I lov-

Someone I care about.

I hesitate before finally speaking, "It's my mum." Her expression becomes blank with confusion, like what I have just said means nothing to her. She raises a brow to challenge my words. I continue,

"I do this for her. You remember Ken, don't you?" I ask and she nods her head.

"How could I forget?" She argues back and a silence grows between us for a moment or so.

"If I don't.." I stop, my throat tightens. It's as if the words are beginning to strangle me and I haven't even said anything yet, "If I don't do this he will hurt her again." I curse at myself for yelling slightly. I hate shouting but I feel like that is the only way that people listen to me..

"Again?" Of course that is the only part she would pick up on. I know the truth will come out, it always comes out. So why not save the bullshit and tell her now?

"One night.. when I was eight.." with every passing second I feel my paranoia grow, for a moment I'm not sure if I can continue.. but then her small hand reaches out to comfortingly touch my arm and just like that I can breathe again.

***
Ivory's POV

My heart swells unfortunately big in my chest. I ache for him. Just seeing the difficulty this is causing him is tearing me apart.

"My dad- Ken. He went out one night and he idiotically got drunk and picked a fight with the wrong guys. They came to our house looking for payback but he wasn't there.. they instead found my mum and I." His eyes soften as he recalls the night, his lips twist down into a deep frown.

"I couldn't protect her then so I will protect her now."

He cuts his explanation painfully short and turns away from me, his body shifts towards the window where he peers out onto the abandoned street.

His face glows a cool orange tone as the street lamps reflect onto his pale skin. His hair is now completely tossed from the harsh wind outside and yet this flawed boy still looks so perfect.

"So how does this.. this girl fall into play then?" I bite the flesh inside of my cheek to mask the urge to cry, my arms quickly fly up to cross over my chest in a defensive stance.

"The feds. If Robyn blabs shit about me to international agents I'll go to prison, Ivory. I fucking hate to admit it but she blackmails me." His eyebrows scrunch angrily as he spits his words at me and his forehead creases in annoyance at the mere thought of seeming so weak. Of looking like a doormat, "That's why I kissed her back." He explains and my chest shrinks with internal pain. Robyn.. so that is her name. Gosh she is so beautiful.. so perfect for him.

"Ivory.. I wouldn't have kissed her if I had no other choice. I swear." My eyes shift from his face. The wound of seeing him so close and intimate with another girl is too fresh and too painful for me to even comment back to what he has said.

He plops down onto the sofa and I take in a large breath to mentally prepare myself for what I am going to say next.

"You don't have to be like them. You can be different, Hardin.." I speak my words with authority and sternness. I want him to truly understand that there is a life other than the one he is living.

He snorts, throwing his head back in pure ignorance, "I would rather die as I am, as me, than live as someone you so desperately want me to be."

My mouth unknowingly falls open as I hold my gaze on him. Did he really just say that?

"I have no business telling who you should or shouldn't be, Hardin. Why can't you understand that I am trying to help you?" I bite back, I can feel my adrenaline circle throughout my body as I near my tipping point. I can already see this conversation going terribly wrong.

"Then keep trying because I am under no obligation to make sense to you." I grab at my hair and and tug at my scalp. I laugh, is this man being serious?

"I am losing my mind trying to understand yours! You may not have had a choice then but you have a choice now and you're choosing wrong.." My voice dims the longer I talk and he notices.

"You know what your problem is?" I start and he laughs, raising both his eyebrows in amusement to our progressing argument.

"Oh! Please do tell me what my problem is, Ivory! Cause' I'm dying to fucking know!" His tone is aggressive as he jumps up from the sofa  however I have came this far and I am not backing down.

"You have become so damaged and so broken that whenever someone tries to give you what you deserve you have no fucking idea how to respond! So, you do everything in your power to ruin it." I'm breathless as my rant comes to a close, my chest is rising and deflating rapidly at the intensity of the moment.

"That is what your problem is." Words fly from my mouth that I never thought I'd even think, let alone say out loud. I know instantly from the look on his face that they have hit there mark.

I leave him speechless. He stands completely still only a few feet away from me, his arms sway by his sides in defeat and his eyes fall closed as he sighs.

"Something inside of you is hurting, Hardin. That's why you need cigarettes or whisky, or even music turned up so freaking loud that you can't hear yourself think." I cautiously step closer to him, my hands hesitantly and shakily come to touch his face. I take his soft cheeks into the palms of my hands. My eyes settle on his green orbs and his gaze softens.

"Let me help you. Please." For a killer his eyes are remarkably gentle.

I'm not sure if it is something I said or something I did but he kisses me and I don't hesitate to kiss him back.

***
A/N: Hey everyone! How are you doing? Tell me about your day, your thoughts and your life! What has happened recently that you're just so happy about? How's school? I got rejected from college (I know, what a bummer!!) but I'm not going to let that get me down! I'm going to stay hopeful and consistent! <3