songs used in these: illicit affairs and this is me trying by taylor swift
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𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 - 𝐛𝐲 𝐣𝐞𝐰𝐞𝐥 𝐧𝐲𝐮
for quite literally nobody
i'm on a mercurial high. someone; no one, try to stop me.
didn't i follow my fears down? or did my credence decide to intervene?
i have a lot of regrets. i don't quite know what to say or what to tell you except that
it died; we died. we died a million times before we burst into flames
all my wasted potential was all used on you and only you, pouring my heart
out to what was said to be the best thing that ever happened to me
our clandestine stares, i lost myself in those eyes. our greatest tragedy
was our biggest success; this godforsaken mess
i've had a hard time adjusting, still so deeply and passionately
searching for what i had given you
you know damn well i'd ruin myself a million more times just to lose
myself in those eyes once more and watch the world disappear
i chose you undoubtedly over and over again and you taught me a
secret language nobody else could speak
your scent is still there, i can't ignore it. you're here in my doorway and i
can't get rid of you.
it's like we didn't exist, the deleted messages and the nights we can't remember.
i drink the poison that my mind pours and i relish in.
our love was a necessary tragedy, my words shot to kill.
do you still think of me? because i refuse to watch you leave.
you drew these illicit memories in my mind that i can't erase
we were both born just from one single glance, but the fight we had
put up might have caused us death.
you'd touched a place in my heart where love ran wild, and you've
probably forgotten about me already
i just hope you know that this is me illicitly trying.
- j.n, illicit affairs and this is me trying
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𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲 - 𝐛𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐥 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐠
! TW ! - mention of blood, self-harm, explicit content
for anyone in a bad place; you are not alone.
You're in a room; a dark room, and you can't see anything. You can feel metal chains around your wrists and your ankles.
You try to stand, but you're tied down. You can't move.
You're stuck in a hole. There are no footholds or a rope nearby.
You're in over your head and it's killing you.
You grab the knife from the kitchen, wondering what it would feel like
to have its silver blade embedded in your stomach.
It's stainless steel, but wouldn't it be stained in your blood?
No. Don't think like that. Think about the people around you.
It's hard, I know, but you can do it.
You don't know me, but I need you. I don't know you either.
You need you.
But what would it feel like to have your blood running down your hands;
You've slit your wrists.
It hurts. It hurts so bad, but you're okay with it.
You shouldn't be okay with it.
No. You need to be okay. I need you to be okay.
BE OKAY.
NO! Stop. It hurts. You want to leave, I understand.
It isn't exactly heaven down here.
But think about your mum, your dad. They love you. It would kill them to live
in a world without you.
You can't do this. Not to you, or to me.
You know that man upstairs? Well, He only gives a soul
what that soul can carry.
That means your soul is strong! You're being given these challenges
because you are strong!
Fine then, prove them right. Take the easy way out. But just remember,
you're okay.
- c.d, super random, no songs.
