Part of Me

17

17

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"All the money you made will never buy back your soul."
-Bob Dylan

"ARE you nervous?" Mary asked me abruptly as she held my dress out toward me.

I shrugged, taking it. "No, you've covered for me before. I—"

She laughed as she turned around so I could change. "No, I mean, are you worried about tonight? I mean, this is your first date, technically."

I bristled as I slipped into the dress. "It's not a date."

"Mhmm," she sang. "Whatever you say. How's it fit?"

"Perfect considering I haven't grown in almost three years."

The girl was fourteen and already almost as tall as me. Quite rude, if you ask me.

The dress was fancier than I remembered, which was a good thing considering it was all I had going for me other than some mascara. It was a light baby blue color and fell to just above my knees. Lace covered my torso before the dress fell into a soft, cotton-like material. I hadn't worn it in so long—I hadn't needed to wear anything even remotely fancy for so long.

The best I could do for shoes were black flats that Mary had stashed in a bin in our closet, so hopefully no one minded.

"He's still picking you up the next street over, right?"

"And dropping me off there, too, but he's not happy about it." Things between us had been a bit tense since he read that poem. There was still a small part of me that thought he saw me differently, though he didn't say anything about it, nor did he treat me like I was going to break.

I glanced at the clock on the nightstand and then back at Mary, taking a deep breath to calm my nerves. Mary had been getting in my head for the past two days that it was a date and although I knew it wasn't, my anxiety evidently wasn't aware. "Okay, I gotta go. Are you sure you guys will be okay?"

"Positive. We can handle things without you for a night. Now, go! If it's not a date with Cayden, go meet a rich future-doctor to marry." She winked at me and all but shoved me toward the window. "Remember, though. Any later than eleven-thirty and I'm gathering a search and rescue team."

"Just in case Cayden kills me and buries me somewhere?" I joked.

"Don't even joke," I heard her mumble as I climbed out the window.

"You're so dramatic," I mimicked, earning a glare. "Relax, Mar. I'll be fine. I've survived this long. I refuse to die at the hands of someone like Cayden."

She scoffed and put the window down once I reached the grass. I made sure to duck under the windows like I always did even though Jason was probably too absorbed in the T.V. to notice anything outside and Diane was in the kitchen.

"Hey," I said a bit breathlessly as I got into Cayden's car. He turned to look at me, but froze once he did. His mouth parted a bit and his eyes wandered down my figure, making me shift self-consciously. "What? Is this not dressy enough?" He was wearing a suit...

That seemed to snap him out of whatever haze he was under, though, because he suddenly blinked and cleared his throat. "You, um, you look gorgeous."

My eyes widened in shock. No one had ever told me that. Adam used to flirt with me and call me sexy, but somehow Cayden's compliment meant more. It was so tame and not filled with any of the unrequited lust that Adam's was. I felt my face heat up and I gulped before answering. "Thanks." I wanted to tell him that he looked good, too, but it just felt awkward and forced. Not that I didn't mean it, but it wasn't something I would normally say, so I just shut my mouth and let him speed away.