Demi
"She has a less than five percent chance of survival..."
The doctor's words made circles in my head. He showed no sympathy as he told us that Jessica probably wouldn't make it. He read off the statistics of her survival like he was talking about an animal or a failed experiment rather than a human being, the love of my life. I'm not sure when it happened, but I lost it.
I lunged at him, gripping his throat, satisfied with the look of fear that clouded his features. I tried to call him every cuss word and insult I could before whispering menacingly in his ear.
"You fix whatever the fuck is wrong with my fiancé or I swear to God you won't live to be sorry."
By the time her aunt pulled me away from him, his face was flushed from the lack of oxygen and he scurried into the ER as I kicked the furniture in the waiting room out of frustration.
No one knew what to do. I assume they were all too afraid to approach me, knowing how close to the edge I was. It was her aunt who finally had the courage to hold me. The instant she touched me, I broke down.
That was almost five weeks ago. There wasn't any significant improvement in Jessica's condition but at least she was in there, somewhere. That was five times longer than that shit of a doctor predicted. I forgot how the outside of a hospital even looked considering I never ventured further than the door of her hospital room.
Jasmine didn't take things well, she never left the hospital but she never attempted to see Jessica. I assumed it was hard for her to see her hero so broken, so helpless. Susan kept herself busy by ensuring that Jasmine and I were OK. She brought us food, clothes and whatever else we needed. Lea came to visit her every weekend and she called us twice a day to ask if there were any improvements. I could tell that everyone's patience was wearing thin. The doctor's had suggested we take her off life support but I refused. I knew she was still there, she just needed a little more time to fight.
"Hey Jazz..."
I called from Jessica's room door. Jasmine always stayed in the waiting hall right across from the room. She looked up from her cellphone and stared at me.
"...you ate already?"
She nodded and I went back inside the room. I changed into PJs and got comfortable in the chair beside Jessica's bed and looped her hand in mine and proceeded to play with the engagement ring on her finger.
I admired her sleeping frame, just as I've been doing for the past five weeks. I tried telling her bad jokes, tickling her, singing, reading her favourite books to her, anything really in an attempt for her to respond but she just laid there. Blank.
"Babe, you know they're trynna convince me to take you off life support but they wont win..."
I graced my lips over her knuckles and proceeded to rest my cheek against her open palm as the first set of tears escaped.
"...I just need you to come back to me Jess..."
I scooted her over a bit on the bed and laid beside her, spooning her from the side. I didn't care about hospital rules at this point. I just needed to feel her close to me.
"... I know what you mean when you used to say you could feel me because I can still feel you in there. All I need is some kinda sign...anything...please...because I can't exist without you."
I buried my head into her chest and I took in a deep breath. It comforted me that she still smelled familiar, like herself. I intertwined our fingers and I willed myself to sleep.
••••
"Demi, baby, wake up sweetheart."
I quickly sat up in the bed to see Jessica looking worriedly at me.
