My Weakness | Tom Felton

Sarounded

I never pictured myself here. In a situation where I'm just a fool for love, I never pictured myself giving up.

Falling in love is the best feeling ever but unfortunately, love has a dark side. I wanted to be fully perfect just to keep him beside me. Losing control until I started keeping hundreds of secrets just to please myself and think that this way is the best way to complete our love story.

But starting a love story with lies and secrets ends us tragically.

 I needed someone to know everything about me, the real me. But I knew I wasn't good enough with all my problems and mixed emotions, my people would definitely get bored and rush out immediately. Cause who cares about others problems, people stay if they are having fun but they would leave if we started bragging.

 Why would they listen or handle our problems if they can't handle theirs?

 My lies led me to a closed place, even my eyes weren't allowed to open. I believed that at the end of this dark closed atmosphere I'll find my bright safe place and I'll allow and dismiss whatever I want, but only when my soul is cleaned and every lie and hidden folders are out.

But when? I'm not ready yet.

I started opening my eyes when I felt serious cramps in my stomach ''Ahh'' I tried to sit down.

''Don't move''

''Tom you scared me, what happened?'' I looked at Tom sitting on my left and looking at his phone not caring to look at me.

''The baby is gone.''

''W..what? Tom look at me.''

''I can't face a liar.''

My tears ran down, I was scared to have this baby but I didn't want him to die!

''Please Tom look at me, I wanted to tell you about the baby... Tom say something''

''What do you want me to say huh?'' he looked at me and I could notice him getting angry.

''I wasn't planning on-.'' 

''Daisy you were planning everything. Lying to me and keeping the baby a secret, talking to Ross..''

''No I swear.''

''Stop, I don't want to hear anything from your bloody mouth. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOU.''

''Why Tom? Let me explain please''

''I don't want to hear your excuses, YOUR FILTHY EXCUSES that I always believe. But not now not today, I wont let you talk and I wont let myself believe a lair like you. You will not play me ONLY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, ONLY BECAUSE I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU. ''

''Tom please I'm not playing you, nor(crying)''

''Cry, you only cry.''

''I love you Tom please.''

He stood up and walked a minute, ''This shouldn't have been kept a secret away from me, didn't you realize it was serious?'' He said  while he was looking at me with his red eyes that broke my heart. ''I thought you'll leave me.'' When those words were heard by him, he was in shock.

''Do you know what's more important than love Daisy? Trust. And our relationship lacks trust,  we should go in our separate ways I think it's best for both of us.''

''NO TOM NO (Door slam)''

I could feel that hot liquid on my stomach and I just remembered how Ross stabbed me and then, the faint knocked me out as I was wishing everything happened was a dream... a nightmare.

[TOM'S POV ]

She didn't understand that I wanted her forever, I was just a fool for her and I trusted her more than anything. I don't want to listen to her cause I know my heart will accept her again recklessly without even remembering how she kept our baby a secret.

I can't even trust her now, is the baby even mine

No I shouldn't t think this way NO (Hands on his head with pain) ''Why Daisy?, you could've died today or we could've had the baby and started as a small family and waited together till it grows.''

''Are you okay mate?'' Rupert asked 

''No not really.''

''What's wrong then?''

''I was going to be a father.''

''YOW MATE CONGRATS .. wait but what do you mean you were ?''

''Daisy was stabbed today by that fucking asshole Ross-''

''WHAT? How is she?''

''I don't care about her.''

''Tom it's not her fault.''

''She didn't tell me she was pregnant.'' 

''Maybe she was afraid.''

''From me? Look Ross I don't want to talk about her anymore.''

''Daisy loves you-''

''If she 'loves' me she could've told me she was fucking pregnant.'' I started to feel that anger rise again so I went back to my room and laid on my bed. 

I still smell her perfume on the sheets of my bed something flowery mixed with darkness and mysteries, I could see her sparkling all around my room. Still hearing her laugh wishing a baby would join that laugh too.

AfTer WeEks

My beats are no longer playing the tune of passion, I am searching for a righteousness that could comfort me. Now my feelings are for tourists only , and everything has ended in a homeland that had always harbored her. I want her to take my soul away from her and give it back to me, maybe I can live better. It is crazy to be hostile to everything that's in her but at the same time I can't be against her.

(Sending Daisy  a voice not while he is drunk)

''Stop appearing in every woman I know. Daisy you just frustrate my effort to overcome you. How can I forget you huh? I'm searching in everyone's eyes just to find a copy of you so I can forget you a little but i I can't.

Without even talking, you talked without awareness. Everything is understood now please enough don't claim. Forget what you did with me and with our future, don't be sad my heart isn't hurting . That's not my voice that's just my soul leaving from my soul. Don't panic, relax even when I am dying I wont say your name. Hey and don't feel sad live your life enjoy it, it's enough  for me to feel the pain.

Daisy my veins dried up when I left you but now all feelings are dead.''

[AUTHOR POV]

Sometimes when your heart stops it needs a shock that can make it beat again, and when you feel your heart is weak you just need to get betrayed to make it strong. 

Life isn't the main problem, people are. They build the problems and then they do the explosion after.

Tom was broken when he knew he lost his child, but what would happen if he knew he was losing the love of his life too..