beetlebum - oasis/blur

DAMON GETS INSECURE

DAMON'S POV

"He's just such a fucking wanker!"

So here I was, sat talking shit about Jess' ex as our interview ended. The twat had just ruined my whole mood, he'd just ruined fucking everything. Christ, I hated him when they were dating and I hate him now.

Jess seemed so happy to see him too, laughing and smiling as he shot me a smirk, the little prick. It was hard to see her interact with someone I knew she used to kiss, someone she used to fucking love and cry about to me.

The amount of times that she'd come round to mine and sob about him-yeah, it was always stupid fights, nothing major toxic or anything, but he still hurt her. I'd never want to do that.

I knew he probably still loved her, she was Jess, he'd be wrong not to. But couldn't he understand that she wasn't available? I knew he was the type to go after what or who he wanted, disregarding relationships and such, so naturally when we'd bumped into him, I was anxious.

He was also a model and how could I compete with that? I'm not daft, I know I'm famous and people call me fit on the daily, but still. Being a singer and being a model, someone who is literally paid to be attractive are two very different things. And it was Jess' job as well. Not even to mention the shoots they'd do, they'd been in so many magazine covers and shite together.

"Yeah, yeah, Damon," Alex mumbled. I could tell they were sick of it, I'd probably be too. "Look, she's with you, it doesn't matter if what's his face makes a move on her."

I really wasn't convinced though.

Don't get me wrong, I trusted her, I trusted her so much. I didn't trust him, the look in his eyes when he saw her again was enough for me to know that he wanted her. He'd also said something like 'we should get lunch one day' and she just nodded. He wanted to be in her life again.

I was snapped out of my thoughts once again, "Damon! Phone call for you." I walked over to a woman I didn't recognise and took the phone off her. I didn't usually get phone calls when I was out doing interviews.

"Hello?"

"Listen here you cheeky cow," oh I'd know that voice anywhere. "Your interview is over, so get back and apologise to Jess for being a passive aggressive arsehole." It was Brona, of fucking course.

"How the fuck did you even find the number for where we are?"

"Don't question it," then the line went dead.

Oh fuck, I really don't want Jess to be upset over me. She deserves more than that.

After 5 or so minutes I decided to get a taxi and leave. The interview was over, there was no point hanging back any longer. There just wasn't a need for it.

I jogged from the taxi up to Jess' flat, hoping that she'd be in there and luckily she was. And for the first time ever, she didn't look happy to see me and I felt my heart shatter like glass, I could literally feel shards poking at my chest.

"What do you want Damon?" No Dames or love, just fucking Damon. I hated it.

"I'm sorry," I was. I was so fucking sorry.

She sighed, "why have you been all pissy? Moping on about Dylan all day."

"I just-I," I had no fucking clue what to say. "You just looked so happy to see him and I saw the way he was looking at you, it made me angry because I was standing right there and he just kept staring at you, not even giving me the time of the day. Well, he did when he wanted to fucking gloat in my face, smirking at me when you were laughing at him. Dickhead."

"But I don't love him anymore, do I?"

"I don't know." Oh fuck, I'd regretted it as soon as I'd said it. Of course she didn't love him. She couldn't.

I could see her eyes watering slightly, as she opened the door gesturing for me to go. "I can't believe you'd think that after everything."

"Love no, i'm sorry-"

"Go now."

And now I'd hurt her too.

2 DAYS LATER

"Stop fuckin' crying your eyes out, you melt," Neve groaned as she snuggled into Alex. "Please Damon, it's really not that big of a deal. Just apologise man!"

"A beacon of truth our Neve is," Alex kissed her head. "Listen to her." Fucking weird friendship those two had.

"Fuck off Alex, stop buttering me up with compliments so I'll let you compulsively feed me cheese again," she pouted, "I was throwing up for days."

Neve and Alex were right. It had been two days that I'd let Jess and myself feel like shit. I'd mostly been with the boys and her with the girls, each of us getting comforted. Brona had come round to jump me again, but this time I let her, she had a good reason. Kat had scolded me and threatened me loads. Neve was just fucking fed up with me really-she was nice at first, trying to get me to talk to Jess but now she was being a bitch about it.

"I want to talk to her so bad, you don't understand," I muttered. "I don't think she wants to talk to me." I was going to sob again, could feel the tears coming. I'd been in agony, no sleep or anything and it'd only been 2 days.

"Of course she does, you spoon! She fuckin' calls out for you in her sleep and all, does Brona's head in. She misses you, so go fuckin' apologise or I'll tell Dylan she's available."

That was the last fucking straw.

I'd never ran to Jess' flat so fast, nearly scuffed my new shoes and everything.

I hastily knocked on the door and she opened it up. She looked gorgeous as always, but her eyes were dull, not how I wanted them to look when I was around.

"I'm sorry," I started, handing her roses that I'd ran into the shop for. "I know you love me, I do. I didn't mean it, I was insecure and stupid and I just-I love you so much. So much." It wasn't long before she threw her arms around me, burying her head in my shoulder.

"And don't fucking doubt it ever again."

NOTE

this chapter honestly makes me feel sick it's so cringe.
I hope this made u all feel pain.