beetlebum - oasis/blur

GETTING HARASSED BY THE PAPS

BRONA'S POV

Bastards.

That's what the Gallagher brothers were, just when I started thinking Liam was sound as well. They'd had to go open their big fucking mouths in an interview, didn't they? Yes, I may sound hypocritical because we talk about them all the time too, but I hadn't said anything bad about Liam or Noel since I'd had a smoke with Liam.

Hadn't even called their tunes wank-which they were.

Couldn't believe them so I couldn't, the things they said like. Fuck me it was doing my head in.

Some of my favourite quotes from the interview would have to be:

"That Neve girl fuckin' loves me, I'm tellin' ya now." -Noel (who was off his tits)

"They're dead on, just a bit stuck up I fink." -LG himself.

"Fuckin' Albarn and his bird, what's 'er name? Yeah, fuckin' joke they are." -Liam once again.

"Noel's bird near got jumped by that other fuckin' girl, I think she fancies 'im." -Liam is such a charmer, saying Neve fancies fucking Noel of all people.

"Who do I think is fitter? Dunno. Fuckin' none of them." -love you too noelie g x

"Kat seems sound enough, 'aven't talked to 'er cause she scares me." - el gee

Lovely.

I swear if I ever see Liam again I'll fucking light him up and smoke him.

Me, the girls and Blur were heading to some proper fancy restaurant because it'd felt like we hadn't had a real meal together in ages. All we did was drink, take drugs and eat crisps together.

I'd gotten all dressed up and all, nice red satin dress and everything. I was going to look fucking hot, as always let's be real. I needed to look good for photos as well, because knowing the paps, they'll be waiting for us.

Damon, Alex, Dave and Graham were going to meet us at the restaurant as they'd been in the studio beforehand, probably recording some shitty song that Damon had written about Jess. They're so cringe.

Why couldn't someone write a tune about me, I'm well fucking fit.

"Shift your hole, Brona!" Kat yelled, grabbing me by the arm and roughly pulling me out from our building. Everyone looked proper nice, all done up with makeup and dresses on.

"You're all so gorgeous," I told them, pouting. So was I. They in return said the same thing to me, as they should.

We walked across the road, further down the street and saw paparazzi already waiting. Fucking melters. Kinda loved it though not gonna lie.

"Brona! Brona! What do you think about oasis and what they've said about you?" One of them shouted at me, shoving their big fucking camera right in my face.

"Couldn't give a fuck, all of 'em are wankers!" I told it how it was. Fucking truth.

The woman turned to Neve who was getting harassed by reported after reporter. "Rumours have been circulating that you've been seeing Alex James from Blur, what is your comment on that miss Turner?"

"Not true."

"And what of Noel Gallagher saying you fancy him? Is that true?" A man shouted at her.

"No, he's full of absolute shite the prick."

Yet another person stepped forward. It was just getting annoying at this point. "According to Liam Gallagher you and Morgan Sutherland aren't on the best of terms, is that true?"

"Sometimes you don't get on with the people you work with, and that's the end of it," she seethed. "She's a fuckin' straightener breakin' bitch, the cheeky cow and she's the worst model I've ever seen, fuckin' doesn't even know how to walk down the runway properly."

Flashing cameras everywhere I tell you. Neve was definitely going to get slandered in the papers for being so outspoken.

"Jess! Miss Momsen! How are you and Damon? Are you going to see him right now?"

"We're fuckin' splendid so we are, love of my life he is," she was in a well good mood. "Yeah, we're going for dinner, all of us."

"And Kat, what about you and Graham Coxon? Is that a thing?"

"Oh no, just mates," she spoke with a frown. Just mates my fucking hole. "Love our Gra to bits though!" Yeah, you sure do bestie.

Eventually they stopped pestering us with questions once we'd reached the restaurant. Some of them were still leeching off us though. One particular man had literally stuck his ugly cunty face up to the restaurant window, trying to get pictures of all us.

"That was fuckin' mental!" Kat complained, shaking her head. "Thank fuck it's over-I'm starving."

"Yeah, they're like fuckin' animals so they are," I commented, taking a seat beside Graham.

"Did they harass you, love?" Damon questioned Jess, anger becoming visible in his eyes. Yuck.

"I was fine," she assured him, "but they threw like 50 fucking questions in Neve's face." And they had, Jesus it was Morgan this, Noel that, Alex this blah blah fucking blah.

"Aw, come here you," Alex held his arms open for Neve as Dave chuckled at them. "They going on about you and me again? Pricks."

"Seriously Alex, I'll never be seen with you in public again." She pretended to cry, "no! People think I'm fucking the cheese man."

"Right fucking here, and that hurt." They began to argue back and forth. Didn't really pay much mind to them.

"What about this oasis interview then? They said a few things, didn't they?" Graham said, sipping on his drink as he rested his hand on Kat's thigh which both of them seemed so fucking oblivious to.

Neve glared at him, "it's an interview Graham, of course they fucking 'said a few things' what are they meant to do? Sit in silence?"

"Calm down," Jess rolled her eyes. "Anyways, they have some cheek. Saying Neve fancies Noel and going on about me and Damon and shite. Fuckin' dickheads."

"Think I'd rather go out with Morgan than go out with Noel," I added in. And Morgan was dreadful. I got many nods in agreement. "Arrogant arseholes, aren't they? I'll fuckin' strangle them with all my muscles! Like remember that time I carried a carry out all by myself in Asda? They should be fuckin' scared man."

I'm a hard lad innit, won't be coming near me so they won't.

NOTE

this is rushed and I hate it rip
-ur bestie xx