Harlequin

Queen of the sky

drip, drip, drip
that is nothing but the sound a leak in my
cerebral cortex.

only God knows where I will go from here
whether my heart desires for another
or a blood rush
or a dying hush.
Either way when my heart pounds it will
pound alone in its prison cell.

oh the searing pain is coming back
dolphin fin bursting through the spine
I hope it is a pair of faerie wings to carry
me somewhere far, far away in the clouds

because if not it will be another frenzied blade driven
through the heart, death by
being ugly.
being treacherous.
being obsequious.
being me.

I hope I reach the sky unharmed, and beautiful, and true, and
an Angel with eyes of stardust. Blood of moonlight. Skin of glass.
heart of a gorgon. Because I will be all alone, and everyone else is somewhere
down and under
and the only Romeo here
is

because i will never have to ask if i am loved, unloved, never loved
and ask until i cry blood.