Cuffs and Kisses

Chapter 39 - Coffee Cup Full of Tears

Heather

Fletcher picks me up the next day from Kayne's house. We head toward the town center where the main coffee shop is. It's packed when we arrive, so we scurry to the nearest booth and sit down. Fletcher orders two lattes for us. I stare deep into my coffee while Fletcher stares at his phone. I'm enjoying the comfortable silence that passes between the two of us.

Fletcher turns at the sound of click-clacking heels. Revealing the source of the noise, Ali strides up to the table and plops down beside me in the booth with a heavy sigh. Her elbow perches on the table and she leans her forehead against her hand.

"Ali, you seem upset." Fletcher says, unable to hold in a laugh.

"Well, duh. Ryder up and left last night. He just sent me a text to tell me he was dipping and going back to California. Completely out of the blue."

"Well, it is holiday time. Maybe he went back to see family."

"Maybe."

My eyes catch Fletcher's. "Would you mind getting me another latte?" I ask, hoping he will catch the hint that I want to speak to Ali alone.

"Absolutely," he says, sliding out of the booth.

"Nothing for me, thanks," Ali replies without being asked. Ali takes Fletcher's seat across from me.

I saddle up the courage to tell her the truth about Ryder. As much as I dread the thought of telling her about Ryder's dark side, I feel the need to as her friend. I've kept my previous relationship with him a secret, although I've told her some of what transpired during it without mentioning his name.

Because of Ali's mood today, I don't see this conversation going well no matter what I say.

"Ali, I need to talk to you about Ryder." Her eyes lock with mine. "He's not a good guy. Remember that ex-boyfriend I told you about who was shady?" I say. Her eyebrow raises. "That was him. Ryder and I dated when I lived in California."

"You mean the guy you were with for almost two years?"

"Yeah. That was him. Anyway, when he came here, I let my guard down and something happened."

"Is this why he only seemed partially interested in me? Because he's still in love with you?" Ali asked, relief crossing her eyes. "I thought he just didn't like me. But, he did, he was just still in love."

"Well, that's not what I was going to say. You see, after Halloween, he came to my house and took advantage of me."

"Took advantage of you, how?" Ali asked, her brows furrowed in confusion. Then realization stretches across her face. "You can't possibly mean..."

I decide to come right out with the word. "Rape."

At first, Ali looks horrified. Then, her expression changes to one of annoyance. This sudden shift in her reaction confuses me.

"There's no way he did that. You must have misunderstood something."

Taken aback, I reply, "Definitely not."

Ali sighs deeply again and says, "Heather, this is something that's been bothering me about you. You're acting like an attention whore. If you keep crying rape and keep going on about it, no one is going to believe you when it really happens."

Astonished, I reply, "I understand that you didn't believe me when it was about Faulkner, because you've known him for years. But you've known me longer than Ryder, yet you're taking his side. Ali, I thought we were friends."

Nonchalantly staring at her pink-painted fingernails, Ali retorts, "We are, Heather. But I don't appreciate being lied to just because you want attention. I am glad to hang out with you and give you attention, but you don't have to try to get it in this way."

I'm starting to get heated. I kept my composure the first time she didn't believe me, but this is too far. "I'm fucking telling you the truth. Whether you're my friend enough to believe me or not, I don't care. But if that's what this is going to be from here on, I can't be friends with you."

"I'm sure this is just an act so you can have Ryder for yourself just like you took Kayne from right under my nose. Ryder probably hasn't even left town, but broke up with me to be with you. But, if you want to act this way, you're right. Friendship over. Lose my number," she says, sliding out of the booth.

Laurie strides up innocently behind her. "What's going on?" she asks.

"We were just leaving," Ali snarls, grabbing Laurie's arm and dragging her back to their booth.

Fletcher comes back with eyebrows raised, but thankfully doesn't ask about the conversation. He scrolls on his phone and sips his drink. I can't focus on anything except for Ali's words.

I noticed for the rest of the time that those at the table were leaning in close and whispering. Probably about me. I'm sure Ali is twisting my words so that no one will believe me. Eventually, they get up and walk past. Ali has her head held up high, refusing to look at me. Laurie has a scowl on her face and tosses some trash on the table as she walks by.

So Ali turned them all against me. As soon as I hear the doorbell jingle to signal that they've left, the floodgates open. Fletcher slides into the booth beside me and asks, "Do you want to go?"

I nod my head in between sobs, so he escorts me to his 4Runner. I cry in silence while he drives aimlessly down back roads, heading no where.

"Let's just go somewhere I won't have to deal with people." I tell him when I've calmed down enough to speak. I didn't have to explain any further. He drove until he reached the same hill where we had a date. It feels like so long ago, but it's only been a few months. So much has happened since then with Kayne and Ryder.

Without Kayne and Fletcher, I've snuck off here a handful of times to think. The location always seems to calm me, because of the general peacefulness of the nature around. There's no people or distractions, no pressure to think things through under scrutiny or cry with any judgment. Now, I just want to cry.

I'm thankful that there's no feeling of awkwardness when we get there. Fletcher puts the back seats down and I crawl into the back to lie down. He lays down beside me, but stills when I scoot closer to him, perching my head on his shoulder. I can practically hear him overthinking this, but eventually he wraps his arm around my shoulder and runs his hands over my hair. The movement is gentle, it feels different than when Kayne does it while I'm resting my head in his lap. Kayne gives me all the chills up and down my back in a romantic way, but I'm comfortable with Fletcher. He's my friend and we're both okay with being just that.

When I stop crying, I stare off into the distance out the windows. Fletcher's phone buzzes in the front seat. He reaches for it and I glance at the screen while he's reading it. It's a message from Ali. The only glimpse I get before he clicks the screen off is:

OMG Heather is so dramatic. How do you even deal with her? You'll never believe what she told me today...

Another message pops up:

She's such a slut the way she's flirted with you, Faulkner, and Kayne, and now she's after Ryder. She's jealous that Ryder chose me and doesn't want anything to do with her anymore.

I shift away from Fletcher, turning my body to face away from him and resume crying. I can hear him sigh, as if he's failed me. But he hasn't. Apparently, I'm the one who's failed everyone else.