Growing Up 101

Part 1

Growing up, I used to think being an adult would be awesome. I get to have my own salary, buy a house and a car, do whatever I want and travel around the world. Imagine that! It must be thrilling to have such freedom.

But being a kid wasn't so bad either. I didn't have to think about finances, play all day and my grades weren't so bad too. On top of that, I was the teacher's pet. You can say I'm a boast, but that's how it is! When you were born in a well-off family and live in a poor society, people just had to look up at you. Our family was neither poor or rich, but my father did everything to provide us the best. Clothes with famous brands, shoes with fine leather, food served with the best quality, go out for dinner at fancy restaurants, you name it! I have to admit, I was quite spoiled by my parents especially because I was confident I can put up with their expectations. As I age older and become a teenager, everything starts to change.

" Good morning everyone!"

" Good morning Madam Karen!" We sat on our chairs after greeting Madam Karen, our English subject teacher. She is the most sweetest teacher I've ever met. Once, she gave us free pointers plus free lunch for helping her clean up her desk. During Chinese New Year, she would offer the class each a mandarin to have. Although she's kind, she could be clumsy sometimes. She would stumble in front of the class with her papers flying everywhere. It was a total chaos. If it wasn't for that incident, I would have never gotten the idea of giving her a cute suitcase for Teachers' Day.

" How are you today? Everyone feeling good?" She questioned us with a bit of Chinese slang in her words. " What did you had for breakfast, Amber?"

Alright, so here's the thing. I have a huge problem in socialising with people I'm not familiar with. It's not that I don't like Madam Karen, but she is not a person I am used to converse with. My palms would sweat, my heartbeat pulsates at a higher rate and my mind would go blank. It happens all the time, mostly when the teachers call me out whether to ask me a question or instruct me to answer the question on the whiteboard. Overall, this anxiety I'm suspecting to have, is worser than I thought.

" Amber? Are you alright?" " Huh? Yes! Yes, I am. Uh.. I had nasi lemak this morning." I answered.

" Wow, such calories you consume." The popular mean girl in school, Azalea Dato' Hatta strikes again. I rolled my eyes. What is her problem?
" My mom made it for breakfast, so what?" I was going to say that, instead, I stayed quiet and sat.

" Azalea, that was not nice. She was probably famish this morning. Were you, Amber?" Not again! I quickly nodded my head.

Ugh, I feel like I want to hide and bury myself in a deep hole so nobody would acknowledge me. Why did she have to call me out! I sit the furthest from the teacher's table, I never raise my hand to ask anything and I never place my head on the desk. Fine, maybe I did blinked my eyes from getting sleepy in English class but never once I was noticed by Madam Karen. What made her call me out of the blue?

Something has been bugging me since this morning, but I can't express this feeling. Is it just me or my stomach feels a little weird today?

" Amber!" I hear someone whisper from behind. " What?"

" Try checking your uniform. There's a red spot behind." A red spot??

I frantically check my uniform from the front to the back. I start to panic when I feel liquid in between my legs. What is this? Why am I experiencing this?!

I get up from seat to ask Madam Karen the permission to leave for the loo, unfortunately our school's Head of Administration, Sir Ramli walks in and interrupts the class.

" Madam Karen, may I have a word with you?" " Oh yes, Sir Ramli. Sorry class, it will take me a minute."

Just great, at this crucial time, why did Sir Ramli just had to enter the class! It will embarrass me to ask Madam Karen now, especially with this annoying red spot on my uniform. I turn around and ask Ikha, my close friend," Ikha, is it that big? The red spot?"

" I saw it. It must be your first time huh?" First time of what?

" What do you mean?" " Your period cycle. This must be your first day." What is that?! I do not think it's my first day, it's the first time ever! To experience such weird feeling, no wonder I had been moody the week before!

" Ikha, you have to help me. I need to leave for the loo, now!" My eyeballs are now googling every direction of the classroom, aiming for a person.
" Do you even have a pad?" " Why would I need that?" My forehead wrinkled.

She facepalmed. " For your period, duh! I got one, here." She handed a white packet of cotton wool rolled up in white plastic. Is this the pad? I am so clueless, I need explanations, right now!

" Madam Karen!" Not now, Ikha!

" Yes, Zulaikha?" " Amber and I need to blow off some steam. Can you excuse us for a minute?" " Sure, go on."

" Let's go," Ikha pulls my sleeve. I had to go with her since I have no choice. She even covers my uniform to not be seen by Sir Ramli. It would've been more embarrassing than this situation.

" AHHHH! What is this, Ikha?!" I shouted my lungs out. It looked red, like blood! Could this be my blood? Is this the end of Amber Wardina?

I heard her sighed. Why did she sigh?

" It's your blood, or precisely, menstrual blood. It consists of your blood and unneeded tissues in your uterus. Don't worry, some people experience period cramps, I usually do, but you'll get used to it." How positive. Sounds scary to me! After putting on the pad, I quickly exited the toilet stall.

" Why am I having this? Why is my blood coming out of- me?!"

" It's your first day of your menstrual cycle, of course. You're a grown up now, Amber. Brace yourself." She patted my shoulder. " Let's head back to class. We can't be here longer or not our marks will be deducted for skipping a period."

I am bedazzled.