Growing Up 101

Part 5

The anxiety of having people judging me from afar would kill me! The way I pronounce the words, the accent I'm using, what I'll be talking about- everyone will definitely judge me for them! I am aware of myself for being too conscious of how people would think about me. This is going to turn out bad!

"I can't do it, Ikha, I swear to you I can't do it," I relentlessly asked for her help to do anything she could to rearrange the list. Unfortunately, it wasn't under her authority as a prefect. "Sorry Amber, you need to ask Kak Haza since she's the recent secretary. I'm not that acquainted to her. Besides, this is a one life time chance to speak for yourself! Don't waste it just because you're afraid of being judged."

I sighed heavily. No matter what I do, I can't avoid it at any cost. This is going to be my worst nightmare.

"Can you follow me to go to the teachers' lounge with me? I don't want to go alone..."Ikha suddenly pulled my hand repeatedly. I sighed again. "We need to hurry. I can't miss Cik Fateha's Maths class. I need to ask her some questions."

Ikha's forehead wrinkled a thousand.

"This is the first time you have questions to ask about."

I frowned. "How dare you..!" All she did was cracking up in the middle of the corridor.

As I waited outside for Ikha, I caught Puan Halimah walking towards me from the corner of my eye. I had a huge feeling she was going to ask for my help from the way she walked.

"Sorry honey, can I ask for your help?" I knew it. Even if I didn't feel like doing it, I had no choice. I couldn't just refuse helping a teacher. Just this once I'll help her, then I'll return to fetch Ikha. "Yes, teacher?"

Walking idly towards Puan Halimah's silver Honda Civic, I pressed on the car keys she gave me. After picking up the files she mentioned at the back of the seat, I hurried back to the teacher's lounge.

All of a sudden, Ustaz Farhi appeared next to me and also asked for help. This time he needed me to carry some heavy boxes to the Islamic studies room with him. Turned out they were new exercise books for the second formers. Why am I the person doing this when there were so many other students around to help him.

My eyes darted towards my watch. Oh no, I'm 15 minutes late! Ikha must've been at the class by now. I need to scram!

My heels clicked as I ran to the class. I might get my merits deducted if I entered the class late, though I could slip in some information that I helped two teachers at the lounge. It wasn't my fault at all. I was pretty sure Ikha was not at the teachers' lounge, so I sprinted like on track. Supressing the pain I was bearing since this morning, I squinted my eyes. Imagine running for 200m to class with your court shoes as you have to feign ignorance to the menstrual cramps you're having. This is nothing compared to when I was hit on the head by a volleyball.

My forehead was beaded with sweat and my chest palpated heavily to catch my breath as I arrived in front of the entrance. What?

Where's Cik Fateha?

"Where did you go?" Ikha questioned as soon as I sat. "Cik Fateha's not here today, she's on leave."

I pursed my lips. "Long story." I took out my Maths exercise book and started answering some questions. This morning I tossed and turned on my bed, not wanting to go to school.

Why?

My stomach hurt so much!

It felt like someone was punching me nonstop and it stung so much I couldn't bring myself to get up from the bed. I thought Ummi realised I was spending too much time before getting ready, she bursted in uninvited.

"Amber? Get up for school! You're going to be late!" She shook the soft duvet off me.

"Ummi... It hurts..." My eyebrows furrowed as I pressed harder on where it was hurting.

"It stings! I feel like I'm having someone twisting my organs inside! It feels hot too, Ummi.. I can't get up!" Tears started to form in my eyes. This was the first time I had felt the worst pain ever.

I wasn't faking it at all!

"That's how I bear the pain to give birth to you four. And you still don't appreciate me. Get up, you still need to go to school. I'll give you painkillers later." Ummi pulled my arm. I sighed.

Suddenly, I felt an electric shock through my body.

"Argh!" I groaned as the pain worsen. Am I giving birth or having menstrual pain?!

"Cramps are normal. You can do this, Amber. Take your shower and eat painkillers later."

Yet I still couldn't convince Ummi to let me stay home.

As I pondered on the topic I will be choosing for the Speaker's Corner segment next Monday, Puan Syidah stepped into the class for Science.

"Good morning class!"

"Good morning Puan."

"I have great news for you today, we will be learning about every women's biggest headache- the menstrual cycle."

My eyes widened. It's the cycle I'm going through right now! What a coincidence!

"So, before we get to it, may I ask every one of you, have you ever had your menstrual cycle?"

The whole class raised their hands, including me. In fact, it was my first time.

"Oh, Amber?" I heard Azalea spurted.

"Yeah, it's still going. What's wrong with that?" I asked her.

"Teacher, Amber was the only one who didn't undergo her menstruation yet last we asked. She's now an adult! Congratulations, Amber!" There she went, clapping all happily for me, which was obviously fake.

"Azalea, just because she had her menstrual cycle doesn't mean she's now an adult yet, but you're going through puberty, Amber. Great job!"

My cheeks blushed in pink from the clapping sounds of my classmates. I saw how Azalea batted her eyelashes at me, but I didn't care. I'm growing up and so was she. We're supposed to be mature kids by now.

I listened to Puan Syidah's teachings the whole class and finally had a solid understanding of the menstrual cycle. It may sound difficult and complicated at first, but once you've get the hang of it, it wouldn't be as rigid as you'd think. I guess this would be the first time I was so attentive in her class.