Perfect Illusion

Chapter 22: Very Good Advice

"I'll give you both a moment alone with him." Elliot spoke gently, James and his wife Alyssa were both wrought with sadness. Thankfully there were no violent actions this evening, just a sense off loss and grief. Stepping out of the room, he saw the back of her heading towards their office, Sam close behind as he turned to share a look with the older surgeon. She was walking slower than usual but with just as much conviction, making a bee-line for her desk chair as soon as they entered. Hot on her heels as per, Sam closed the door quietly behind them. Despite looking composed, he could tell by her chest that she was breathing quickly. A clear sign of emotional distress.

"I shouldn't be this shocked." She stated coldly. "I knew his situation." She licked her upper lip slowly, her eyes only meeting his for a split second before they fluttered shut when she leant back into her seat with a large, shaky exhale.

"He was your father, no matter what you were prepared for, it'd still be a shock." He remained standing by the door, offering her a little bit of space at least. His brows twisting with concern when she let an icy, humourless laugh out. However uncaring she sounded right now, he knew she was masking her true feelings. Her dead smile was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

"It looks like I'll be living with that last moment after all." She swallowed, her face tensing in desperate attempt to hold herself together. Sam breathed out slowly, sympathising with her.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be." She sniffed, sitting up straight again as if trying to shake off the shock. "I never liked him, I'm only sad for myself. I haven't lost anything today aside from the chance to clear my conscience of that comment." He could tell she was really wrestling with her emotions, thus he made the informed decision to give her some room.

"Regardless, you've had a few shocks today. It wouldn't be abnormal to feel overwhelmed by all of this." He pressed his lips together, watching her rest one elbow on the desk as she let her forehead fall into her hand, massaging at her skull tirelessly. Her other palm smoothed over her bump in a habitual manner. His comment was of course referring to both the death of her estranged father and the news that one of the babies, his baby, was showing signs of a heart defect. "You know where I am if you want to talk to someone." He gave her one last look before opening the door and leaving. Her lack of response told him she just wanted to be alone.

"How is she?" Elliot breathed beside him, slightly startling the younger registrar.

"In shock." His conclusion was short but accurate. "I think it'll hit her later on, she had some unfinished business with him."

"And now it'll remain unfinished." He sighed as they walked away from the door and back to the nurses station. The evenings on Darwin were usually rather peaceful, allowing them to converse freely under the dimmed night lighting of the ward. "I tried to get her to see him before I called her brother but she wasn't having it."

"She was on her way to see him after the ultrasound, she wanted to speak to him." Sam blinked sadly, understanding the feeling she was currently experiencing. "It was on her mind for the entire appointment, I could tell." Stopping for a moment, he continued with a more stark tone. "One of the babies is showing signs of a heart defect, the smaller of the two." His brow twitched sadly. "She didn't even react."

"The world really is testing her at the moment with it's cruelty." He breathed regretfully, taking a seat at the nurses desk. "How serious is the defect?"

"It looked big in my opinion but I'm not all too familiar with heart defects in unborn babies. Dr Thompson said it was SVD."

"SVD isn't usually too serious, but the severity varies between babies. Regardless, I am sorry to hear that." His glossy blue eyes truly conveyed his utter sympathy as he sat. "I'm glad you were at the appointment though, that comforts me."