filling in canon: sge oneshots

the day of the duckling

"I dunno," said Chaddick, stepping back and squinting at the list scrawled madly on the blackboard. "They all seem a bit... far fetched."

"Nothing is more far fetched than whatever that was." said Bastian. Chaddick had to admit, he had a point.

The Everboys crammed into the Library of Virtue solemnly considered their list, which read thus;

Black magic

Mass hallucination

Kidnapped and replaced

Kidnapped, murdered and replaced

Evil (...Good?) twin

Really really elaborate prank

She's gone crazy

WE'VE gone crazy

You-know-who killed her and disguised herself as her

"It has to be one of them." said Tristan.

"Maybe it's like a mirage." mused Hiro. Everyone turned to stare at him. "Like, when you want something so badly you hallucinate it? Like water in a desert?"

"No one wanted Agatha to inexplicably turn beautiful!" protested Tarquin. Chaddick wrote mirage on the board anyway.

"Don't speak too soon," muttered Nicholas. "One of us has to take her to the ball."

"I thought Chaddick said that two of us would go together, rather than take her?" said Tristan. Chaddick tapped the chalk on his thigh, feeling, and probably looking, rather sheepish.

"I wasn't serious. As grim as the prospect of taking Agatha to the Snow Ball is... well, I don't know about you lot, but I'm not a murderer. No one knows what happens when you fail, but whatever it is, you never get seen again. We kinda have a responsibility to the girls in that respect, y'know? Stupid, but there it is. One of us just has to put up with being absolutely dragged through the mud for a night. Agatha might have stood on my foot in Good Deeds, called me pathetic, and made fun of my Visiting Weekend shirt, but I don't think any of us actually want her to fail."

"Speak for yourself," murmured Oliver, but he didn't put any heat behind it, and looking around, Chaddick found they all looked rather grim.

"We owe her, now." said Chaddick firmly. "Saved Ted in the Trial, didn't she? Got some pretty gnarly burns from sneaking in, too."

"Maybe Tedros should take her." said Tristan. "So they're even."

There was a discontented murmur as everyone tried to figure out the politics of that. Oliver produced the piece of paper with all the current plans for ball proposals and started trying to bump everyone down a slot. Chaddick scoffed.

"Be realistic. We all know what Tedros is like with courting girls. He tolerates Bea to be polite, and because her mother is funding the renovation of Blue Tower in Camelot Castle, but he's got some proper baggage from the whole Guinevere thing, so he actually wants to take a girl he likes. But there aren't any, so he'll just take Beatrix."

The Everboys stared at him. Chaddick blinked.

"Is this not a we situation?"

"I'm fairly sure this is something he has told you, and only you." said Oliver dryly.

"Why does he tell you everything?" demanded Nicholas. "I'm his roommate too!"

"You never get up with us when we go and work out in the mornings, lazy git!" Chaddick threw a spare piece of chalk at him. "Pays to get up at 5am to go on his horrible swimming excursions!"