In Love With Formula 1

Part 83

I sat on the beach once again just enjoying the time here, this family, despite all being fiercely competitive, were some of the most loyal people ever, they had let me stay here when I had a hotel in Madrid and then cooked me food and made me feel welcome, I couldn't not love them.

I looked off in to the sea with the moon reflecting off of the water and closed my eyes and taking some deep breaths, I did this to remind myself of how good life actually was and it also helped me remember how small and insignificant we were, we could do anything we wanted at the end of the day, we all die in the end. 

"Hey" Carlos said snapping me out of my thoughts

"Hey" I said looking up to him with a small smile

"I understand why you live by the sea now" Carlos said as he sat down next to me

"It's so calming, I forgot this was here until the other night" he added

"I have a calling to the sea" I said sarcastically making Carlos laugh

"You do realise it's freezing out here and you are in a dress"

"Didn't notice to be honest, it's nice"

"Have this idiot" Carlos laughed as he threw a jumper at me

"Thanks" I replied as I pulled it over my head, I could only just make out the colours from the moonlight, my best guess was that it was a Ferrari jumper.

We both sat there just listening to the sea and watching the waves come and go getting slightly closer each time because of the tide. I rested my head on Carlos' shoulder and leaned in to him a bit after a while just to remind myself I wasn't alone anymore.

"You know, when I disappeared when I was like 10"

"Yeh"

"I went to France, the same racing school as Pierre, Esteban and Anthoine"

"Okay"

"I spent most of my time in hospital"

"How come, were you ill?"

"Not physically"

"That doesn't make any sense"

"I tried to commit suicide, like all the time"

"Seriously?" Carlos said now looking at me with worried eyes

"Yeh, I spent every birthday in the hospital, from 13 to 17"

"Fuck"

"And that's where my alcohol problem came from and the smoking"

"You didn't have anyone there?"

"Not really, I made conversation with some of classmates but they only knew my name nothing else"

"Thank you for telling me, I'm guessing Lando knows"

"No, you are the only one"

"Oh, well thank you" Carlos said as he reached in his pocket for something.

He pulled is phone out and went on to instagram and opened the camera.

"Smile" He said as he got ready to take the selfie

I rolled my eyes then smiled, it was quite a big smile for me, teeth and everything

"That's a big smile for you" Carlos said before posting it with 'happy birthday' written under it

"I'm happy what can I say"

Carlos helped me up and then grabbed my hand as we walked back towards the house, I think it was a small gesture to say that he liked me too, but I could have been wrong.