insanity

12| welcome, to hell.

129 days until his death
—
I sat in the office of the White House, fiddling with my lighter.
I've always been fascinated with fire, there's just some beauty in the rusty orange flame, as it twinkles; being manipulated by the air.

I sit as I wait for Tommy, Tubbo and Wilbur.
I was fully prepared for today. Tubbo and I spent hours preparing last night.
We had routes of escape planned, Tubbo brewed multiple invisibility potions that he would keep with him.

To be fair, the only thing we weren't prepared for— was a win.

We were hopeful, we wanted and needed this win, but we sure as hell aren't expecting it.

I'm sitting in the 'Presidents' chair, spinning slowly, as to not distrupt the peace of the flame.
I'm wearing another dark blue dress, a similar color to yesterday's, but a very different dress.
Still short, and rather form fitting, but still very different.

In addition to a garter that sat high on my thigh, holding a special dagger that I'd owned for awhile— crafted myself long before any of this.
Just in case if all of this goes more south than we can imagine, I have a way to protect myself and anyone else I have to, especially since weapons of any kind are strongly prohibited from the event.

I stop the spinning, and look up from my lighter at the door after hearing a creak.
My eyes meeting with the three boys in front of me, Wilbur yelling some final details to the event decorators.

Tommy and Tubbo surprisingly make no effort to greet me and sit in two of the three seats, on the opposing side of the desk.

Wilbur, slowly trailing behind the two, notices me in his chair.
With a smile on his once serious looking face,
"Up." He murmured.

I smile and rise from my seat, sitting next to Tommy who was centered around the desk.
Wilbur readjusts his chair, as I had pulled the seat all the way up.

"So." Wilbur looks up from the handle under his seat.
"Want to start us off with the plan Tubbo."

Tubbo nods,
"Well, as I told you two briefly, y/n and I have been preparing. We spent all last night and have a route to escape if needed. I have some potions of invisibility in this bag." He held the bag up that rested across body, from left shoulder to right hip.
"The pathway underground leads to a covered and undiscovered ravine."

"Brilliant." Wilbur nods, his smile creeping bigger. I can tell he has no other thought other than pride, as if all the threats and events of yesterday hadn't even happened.
As if all of our seven months of work hadn't been practically teared down. I can see the look behind his eyes, he is so sure of a win.

I've seen this happen so many times before during the war, the man has so much faith and watching it diminish breaks me.
Though it tears him down more. I don't think he's fully aware of the situation at hand, the fact that loosing is higher than the odds of a win.

With zoning out into all these thoughts, I had been awaken by the three talking about the plan furthermore, then hearing the words,
"Tubbo and Tommy you are dismissed. Please go direct the decorators and people who are early."

The pair nodding in unison, while walking out the door.

Wilbur turned to me,
"How are you feeling? You seem distracted."

"Oh. Uhm- I'm aright." I shake off my weariness, in hopes to get rid of his worry.
"Just a little nervous that's all."
Which wasn't a lie, it's just that the feelings were a lot more deep rooted than a little bit of anxiety.