Practicing Medicine // Complete

Chapter Nineteen: The World's Most Autistic Cowboy

(+)19

2075 ROBCO(R)

LOADER V1. 1

EXEC VERSION 41.10

32K RAM SYSTEM

6504 BYTES FREE

HOLLOW TAPE LOADED: "THE-WORLD'S-MOST-AUTISTIC-COWBOY"

INITIALISING...

SUCCESS!

STATUS

Battery Level: 100% (CHARGING)

Wireless Signal: (?)

Operating Temperature: 92F

HEALTH

BP: 120/90

SPO2: 100%

Temp: 98.5F

RR: 12

HR: 70

WARNING: GALLBLADDER ABSENT!

TIME

Day: 1 October 2279

Time: 18:32

CLIMATE

Current Temperature: 78F

Atmospheric Pressure: 762 mmHG

---

It was late in the afternoon, and all I could smell was fresh laundry. Despite our best attempts to stink the place up over the last week, the scent of cleanliness still pervaded the whole underground shelter, which was matched by the clean, colorful carpets, the striking, off-white Bakelite wall-paneling with the painted-on grass and ferns, and the high arched ceilings. Not the kind of fallout shelter that I would have picked to stay in, but it was unarguably high-concept and luxurious; Until this week, I'd never been anywhere so genuinely untouched by the apocalypse.

Too bad the original family never got to use it. From across the room, I heard an angry beeping noise, and then a fist slamming against a metal desk. I groaned and looked up from my pillow to see Savanna glowering over the living-room computer terminal for what had to be at least the hundredth time this week. The image of a lock shone clearly on the glowing red screen.

"Tā mā de!" muttered Savanna, pressing her head against the desk and covering her face with her hands. I lifted my head up off the couch.

"What's that one mean?" I asked. Savanna huffed at me.

"I don't remember- it's an angry word, it means that I'm angry! Who the hell would put all these protections on a Model '35?"

I shrugged, because I didn't know what a model '35 was, or why they wouldn't protect it. Savanna took her hands off of her face. "You know what? One more try. I'll give it one more try, then I'll give up! I'm not falling for another sunk-cost fallacy." She turned off the computer, waited a couple of seconds, and then turned it back on. The eerie red glow washed over her face again as the system came alive, taunting her with its chirpy little welcome crawl...

I couldn't just stand by and watch.

"Can I try? I mean, I don't mean to brag, but I'm what you might call a computer whisperer," I said, which was a lie that was as blatant as it was untrue. Savanna looked at me over her shoulder. There wasn't an ounce of skepticism in her eyes, only desperation. She rolled over to me in her rolly-chair.

"Really?" She asked. I decided to go with it.

"Oh, for sure! There's only one group of people who are better at computers than you Asian-folks, and that's Autistic-folks! It's on account of us basically being computers, y'know?"