Shout

Chapter Twelve - The Tremendous Health Benefits of Dates

Alexander distracted me so much that I nearly missed the beginning of my biology class with Avery. I rushed in quickly finding my seat next to her and dumping my things on the ground.

"Sorry! I lost track of time," I whispered as a I scurried to find my notebook and pens.

"No worries. Were you with Alexander again?" Avery whispered back curiously.

"Yeah. He wanted to do something to celebrate my application being done."

Avery's eyes nearly popped out of her head, "Like a date?!" She nearly shouted. Professor James paused his lecture for a moment looking at Avery expectantly.

My cheeks burned as Avery stated, "Sorry, prof J. I was asking my friend if she wanted a date. Studies concur, the health benefits of dates are tremendous once you overlook the shrivelled, brown texture." She finished with an awe-inspiring smile.

"Yes, well, I'm sure that would be a good topic for another day." Professor James responded as I hid my scarlet face behind my hands.

"Continue, please!" Avery beckoned quietly.

"It's not a date, Avery." I told her removing my hands from my face. "He doesn't think of me that way anyway. He said I reminded him of his sister."

"Well, that's not exactly promising." Avery admitted. Trust Avery to give you the honest to goodness truth even if it was a dagger.

"It's not like I'm ready to date anyway," I told her. "I can't even tell my mom about it and she's already planning a family get together for when she gets back. Not to mention I'm pretty sure the wedding is already planned and paid for."

"But do you like him?" Avery asked bluntly. It was a good question. I'd be lying if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mind. Alexander was extremely attractive, kind, and smart and the good qualities didn't end there. But I was in no place to recommit to someone. My heart wasn't even my own yet. It still felt like a part of me was missing - like I wasn't whole.

"I don't know," I said truthfully.

She shot me a surprised look.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm just shocked you told me the truth. You'd usually take your feelings to the grave with you." She shrugged jotting down notes from the PowerPoint slides.

"I'm working on it," I laughed. I truly was.

"I think that's amazing, Olivia." Avery murmured. "So, when are you going out with Alexander?"

"Tonight. I'm not sure where though. He was being cryptic."

"I can come by later and help you get ready?" She asked.

"Thanks," I'd take all the help I could get.

Avery dropped me off at home before going back to her place to help her mom with some gardening. Avery's parents were the sweetest people. Avery's dad was a psychologist and her mom was a nurse. They were the most loving, functional family I'd ever met. They had become like surrogate parents to me with my mom's constant absences.

When I first met Aaron, I brought him over to Avery's house for him to meet her parents. They were kind but quizzed him as though I were their daughter that they were protecting. When I broke up with him, I told them nearly right after. They comforted me and told me to stay at their home, but I just wanted my life to get back on track as quickly as possible. I always appreciated that support.

I made my way upstairs to dump my belongings and crashed down on my bed. I was just about to snooze until Avery returned to help me get ready when I heard the doorbell ring. I walked back downstairs and opened the door.

"Aaron? What are you doing here?" I asked in utter shock.

"Olivia. Can I come in?" Aaron asked running a hand through his shaggy blonde hair. Was he ever going to cut it? Long hair did not suit him.

"Okay," I said hesitantly stepping aside.

"You look great, Olivia. I mean it." Aaron said looking me up and down in a way that made me feel uncomfortable.

"What do you want?" I asked him trying to sound harsh but the waver in my voice gave my nerves away.

He sighed, "I wanted to talk to you about this meet up that our moms have been pushing the last couple weeks."

"What about it?" I asked in confusion. Obviously the meet up wouldn't happen. There was nothing to meet up about. We were nothing.

"I just came to ask for a favour, Olivia." He said pleadingly.

"Okay," I trailed unsure of his meaning.

"Listen, my parents don't know that we broke up." He began. Broke up is putting is mildly. "To be specific, they don't know about Heather."

Oh. Heather. "So?"

"My dad's going to be there, Olive."

"Don't call me that." This time my tone did come off harshly.

Aaron flinched, "Sorry. Force of habit. Listen if he finds out that I cheated on you with Heather - no money no family connections, Heather" He said disdainfully, "they're going to flip. I don't think my dad will let me work at his firm anymore."

My heart leaped in my chest. Saying yes to something you don't want to do gives someone else power over you, Olivia. "I'm sorry you're going through a tough time Aaron, but you did cheat on me with her." I could feel my heart thumping in my throat. I felt like my lungs didn't have enough air. Was it hot in here?

Aaron took a double glance at me. "Sorry?" He asked dumbfounded.

"There's nothing I can do." I spoke loudly and clearly. My mind was racing and my heart felt like it was galloping but my voice was steady.

"I'm surprised to hear you say that, Olivia."

My lips clamped into a thin line with all the things I wanted to shout at him, but he looked sad. He deserves it. He looked like he was struggling. That's not your problem.

"I think you should go," I stated quietly.

"You're asking me to leave." His mouth was gaping. "You won't even consider my predicament?"

"There's nothing to consider. We're nothing."

"We're nothing." He repeated again looking at me like I'd grown another head. "Is this about Alexander? Are you with him now?"

"It's not about him. It's about you." I told him waving my hands as he stood in front of me.

"So you are with him then?" He asked with something that looked like hurt in his eyes.

"Please, Aaron. Just go." I was desperate at this point. I wanted to cry, I wanted to vomit, or I wanted to shout. Something was coming and I didn't know what. All I knew was that I didn't want Aaron to witness it.

He nodded taking a last look at me before turning around and walking out. I slammed the door shut and locked it before falling onto the floor with my back against the front door, tears pouring out of my eyes and down my face. I wiped the constant tears with the back of my hands, but it didn't stop them.

Why couldn't I say more? Why couldn't I stand up for myself? Why couldn't I be strong?