NCT Lucas Imagines(AMBW)

2: Not Worth It

You suddenly woke from your deep sleep and checked your phone that was under your pillow. The time read 2:03 am. Turning to the side of you, the bed was empty. It hadn't been touched by Lucas all night, indicating that he was still out.

Earlier he had left with the boys to celebrate their first win for their recent album, but you didn't want to go so you stayed back. The media has really been hitting back at your relationship, and you chose not to make it worst by going out with them.

You decided to send him a text.

"I miss you. Be safe, see you when you get home x"

You waited about a minute or two before putting your phone back underneath your pillow. You then decided to go back to sleep.
...

Later on that morning, you had woken again, and this time you felt the heaviness of something wrapped around you. It was Lucas's arm. You scratched your head, feeling the silk bonnet resting halfway onto it. You laid your head back down facing Lucas, and you watched him as he slept. You brought your hand to his face and rubbed your thumb over his full eyebrows.

You love having him at home with you, the nights when he's not here are the hardest, but you figured you'd just suck it up since you signed up for that by getting into a relationship with an artist. But honestly, it's getting harder and harder for you to be seen with him in public. It's only because of your fear of damaging him and his image. He slowly began to wake up and you smiled at his squirms.

"You must be bored." His voice was extra groggy. It gets like that when he's worn out.

"Did you have fun last night?" You asked as you continued to touch and feel various parts of his face.

"Yeah. I wished you were there." He snuggled closer to you, planting his face into your chest and bringing his legs up to tangle them further with yours.

"Well, I missed you a lot too." You kissed his forehead and rested your chin on top of his head.

"Why didn't you come?" He asked. He had lifted his head again to look at you as you thought about what you should say so that you wouldn't hurt his feelings. But the truth is, you don't like living the way that you are. If you could have your life with Lucas without the cameras and people, you would be perfectly fine.

"I was really really tired. And I wanted you to have fun." He slid his large hand up and down your back as you spoke. The span of his hand is so wide that his fingertips brushed the hooks of your bralette while his palm rested a little closer to your lower back.

"I know you're lying." He said quietly. "I know you're putting up with all of this for me..." He rose and brought his hand to tuck a coil back into your bonnet. Then he stopped.

"Can I take this off?" He asked softly. You nodded after which he slipped it off.

"Can I play with your hair?" You blush every time Lucas asks if he can do something to your hair. Of course, he knows that he can when you don't have it styled, but he still asks to respect you. 

"Of course." You smiled as he removed your hairband. And instantly his eyes lit up. No matter how many times he has seen your hair in its raw, unstyled, natural state, he is still amazed by it.

"You're so beautiful this way y/n, don't ever let anything make you believe otherwise. I know that's one of the reasons why you're fed up and tired, because of the articles talking about me being with you." He's right. One of the reasons why you didn't go with them last night is because of what they say about your relationship with Lucas in the media.

That he's only dating you for attention because you're black and from the states. That it's a publicity stunt that's still going on even after a whole year and three months.

"But Lucas I'm not worth losing your career over. Your fans are your whole world-" He cut you off by smashing his lips into your face, with his hand holding firmly against your head.

It felt like the kiss lasted for hours but you weren't complaining.

"You...you are my whole world." He said once he pulled away from you. "And nothing is as valuable to me as our relationship."

He watched you as you had come to convince yourself he wasn't just saying those things. And he wasn't, he was telling the truth. A truth that you should have long ago believed.

"I'm sorry for feeling that way." He shook his head at you as he continued to massage the back of your scalp.

"Don't apologize. Just know that you've got me ok? Nothing's gonna take me away from you." You laid your head down beside him as he filled you in about the night before.