Mira's POV
Warning! The contents in this may triggering! This chapter talks about suicide and terrible thoughts about oneself! It also includes self harm. You have been warned.
Bipolar 1 disorder is what they call it. I had it since I was young. Although, My parents didn't realize it. I was misdiagnosed as ADD then they added a new one, anxiety disorder. It wasn't till after I refused to self medicate and moved out on my own that I found out what was really wrong.
I had gotten away from my family on my own. I was mentally stable. I had a job and was starting to become self sufficient. I was 22. ready to take on the world. I was working with disabled adults. I started making some rookie mistakes. They were mostly harmless and it was part of me not thinking things thoroughly. One day I made a fatal mistake. I told one of the clients something I shouldn't have. I lost my job because of what I said.
That night I realized my error and the bad thoughts came. Your a terrible excuse for a human being you are a bad person your worse than dirt You'd be better off dead. and on and on the thoughts went until I acted. I took a lot of pills and waited.... death didn't come so I called 911 told them I tried to kill myself they came and got me. In the hospital I felt numb to everyone and everything I still wanted to die. I felt well enough to go home. I got an Uber and they took me home. I was still bad off. the words that lady said in the office rung in my ears"Why didn't you just die?"
During this time I started to cut my shoulder. I found that. pain better than my own thoughts. As I aged the extremes were terrible. I started to take new medications for my bipolar, ones that actually worked. I also found a doctor to work with me that I actually trusted because a former doctor would only ask how i was and give me tons of meds.
I started a long war with my mental health. That still impacts me to this day.
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Devrosian Truth
SpiritualeThis is the story of Aribella Tynskey and Mira Draken the author and the editor. This is a story of passion, hardship, struggle, but most of all love. This is the story if how they met... a real life journey. Both spiritual and physical.
