Nothing For Me

Part 7

You and MJ's relationship continued to grow as time went on.
As she started her first year of high school, you worked on yourself, wanting to be good for her.
Overtime, you learned how to process and deal with things better. You focused on yourself and your developing relationship with MJ and needless to say, things started to look up.
The 'present but not really present father' thing didn't affect you as much as it did, but it was still there. It was one of the only things you hadn't fully processed and to be honest, you didn't think you ever could.
Your father is there, and has been aware of presence for almost a decade. And not once has he given you any type of consolation or love like a father should. You would think after Pepper was getting more involved in his life and forcing him to clean up (most of) his act, he would open his eyes and realize that a whole human being was living with him, waiting for him to realize that they were supposed to be relying on him; not an AI built in the comfort of their room.
But nope. Absolutely nothing changed. If anything, things got worse.
He was away more often, focusing on the Avengers. Or he was with Pepper, the new love of his life.
You tried not to linger on the situation often, knowing it would only lead to pain in your chest. So you just stuffed it in the back of your mind, hoping one day that the pain would just lessen all together.
About two months ago, you and MJ had decided to make things official after going on your first date. At first you talked about how fast the two of you were going, but Michelle simply said 'we'll be u-haul lesbians then.' That was the end of the conversation.
Currently, you and your girlfriend were facetiming. You would've made the trek to her house but she was about to study and you both knew that you'd distract her. Plus the two of you were due for some time away from each other considering the fact that you're at her place almost everyday.
"Okay, so I found this recipe the other day and I'm just now remembering it."
MJ looks at you confused, "Okay?"
You roll your eyes playfully.
"I wanted to try it with you. After my ban from your place has been lifted."
"It's not a ban," she chuckled.
"Well, it sure as hell feels like one ba-"
"Mr. Stark has arrived with a guest," M.I.A cut you off.
"Who is this guest?"
"Secretary of State, Thaddues Ross," the AI replied, pulling up pictures of the man.
"Hey M, I'm gonna call you back."
"Yeah, yeah," she nods, looking a little concerned. "Take all the time you need. Let me know if everything's okay."
The two of you give your goodbyes and you ask M.I.A to pull up the live footage from the conference room.
"Perspective. The world owes the Avengers an un-payable debt. You have fought for us, protected us, risked your lives... but while a great a=many people see you as heroes, there are some who would prefer the word "vigilantes", is what you first hear when you start watching.
Immediately your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"And what word would you use, Mr. Secretary?" Natasha asks.
"How about 'dangerous'?" he replies. "What would you call a group of US-based, enhanced individuals who routinely ignore sovereign borders and inflict their will wherever they choose and who, frankly, seem unconcerned about what they leave behind?"
The secretary activates a screen behind him which begins to play the previous battles the Avengers and SHIELD have fought in.
"New York."
He clicks a button, footage of chitauri, shooting guns, and Hulk smashing plays.
"Washington D.C"
A new video appears, showing the insight helicarriers firing at each other with chaos following.
"Sokovia."
The frame changes, showcasing the terrified citizens that were on the flying piece of land.
"Lagos."
"That's enough," Steve interrupts.
Ross nods in response and begins his speech again.
"For the past four years, you've operated with unlimited power and no supervision. That's an arrangement the governments of the world can no longer tolerate. But I think we have a solution."
He places a thick document on the table and slides it across to Wanda. As the team slides the book to each other Ross starts talking.
"The Sokovia Accords. Approved by 117 countries... it states that the Avengers shall no longer be a private organization. Instead, they'll operate under the supervision of a United Nations panel, only when and if that panel deems it necessary."
"The Avengers were formed to make the world a safer place," the Captain begins. "I feel we've done that."
"Tell me, Captain, do you know where Thor and Banner are right now?" There was a momentary pause as the two men's eyes met. "If I misplaced a couple of 30 megaton nukes... you can bet there'd be consequences. Compromise. Reassurance. That's how the world works. Believe me, this is middle ground."
At this point, you're walking out of your room after transfering the feed to your tablet and making your way to the elevator.
"So, these are contingencies," Rhodey states.
"Three days from now," Secretary Ross begins. "The UN meets in Vienna to ratify the Accords. Talk it over."
Natasha speaks up, "And if we don't come to a decision you don't like?"
"Then you retire."
The elevator stops and you look up seeing the Secretary walk in with someone behind him. You give him a subtle disgusted look before turning your attention back to the security footage.
As the deathtrap descends, you can feel his eyes lingering on you.
"Can I help you?"
"You're a little young to be an intern."
"You're a little old to be looking at me like that," you shrug, swiping away from the video on your tablet as you feel him looking over your shoulder.
Ross gives an awkward chuckle and furrows his eyebrows. When you reach the bottom floor, he gets ready to step out and places a hand on your shoulder.
You look at him like he's lost his mind.
"You seem like a good kid. Be sure to make good choices."
Raising an eyebrow, you refrain from saying what you want to say. You lift your hand and gently take his off of you.
"Don't touch me,"
Once he exits, you hear the chatting start back up.
"Secretary Ross has a Congressional Medal of Honor," Rhodes told Sam. "Which is one more than you have.
"So let's say we agree to this thing," Wilson starts. "How long is it gonna be before they LoJack us like a bunch of common criminals?"
"117 countries want to sign this. 117, Sam, and you're just like, 'No that's cool. We got it."
"I have an equation," Vision announces as you get back on the elevator.
"Oh this will clear it up," Sam mutters.
"In the eight years since Mr. Stark announced himself as Iron Man, the number of known enhanced persons has grown exponentially. And during the same period, the number of potentially world-ending events has risen at a commensurate rate."
"Toaster oven's got a point there," you mumble, stepping back on the metal deathtrap.
Steve asks,"Are you saying it's our fault?"
"I'm saying there may be a causality. Our very strength invites challenge. Challenge incites conflict. And conflict... breeds catastrophe. Oversight... oversight is not an idea that can be dismissed out of hand."
"Boom," Rhodey says.
You see Tony lying on the couch, quite relaxed, contradicting the tense atmosphere.
"Tony," Nat starts. "You are being uncharacteristically non-hyper-verbal."
"It's because he's already made up his mind," Steve explained.
"Boy, you know me so well," Stark starts, getting up and rubbing the back of his head. "Actually I'm nursing an electromagnetic headache," he pauses to grab a mug of coffee. "That's what's going on, Cap. It's just pain. It's discomfort. Who's putting coffee grounds in the disposal? Am I running a bed and breakfast for a biker gang?"
Tony puts his phone in a basket and taps the screen. An image is projected of a smiling young man.
"Oh, that's Charles Spencer, by the way. He's a great kid. Computer engineering degree, 3.6 GPA. Had a floor level gig at Intel planned for the fall. But first, he wanted to put a few miles on his soul, before he parked it behind a desk. See the world. Maybe be of service. Charlie didn't want to go to Vegas or Fort Lauderdale, which is what I would do. He didn't go to Paris or Amsterdam, which sounds fun. He decided to spend his summer building sustainable housing for the poor. Guess where, Sokovia."
He pauses for a second as the team soaks in the information.
"He wanted to make a difference, I suppose. I mean, we won't know because we dropped a building on him while we were kicking ass.
"There's no decision-making process here. We need to be put in check! Whatever form that takes, I'm game. If we can't accept limitations, if we're boundary-less, we're no better than the bad guys."
"Tony, someone dies on your watch, you don't give up," Steve rebuttals.
"Who said we're giving up?"
"We are if we're not taking responsibility for our actions. This document just shifts the blame."
"I'm sorry. Steve," Rhodey blurted. "That-that is dangerously arrogant. This is the United Nations we're talking about. It's not the World Security Council, it's not SHIELD, it's not HYDRA."
"No, but it's run by people with agendas, and agendas change."
"That's good," Tony starts. "That's why I'm here. When I realized what my weapons were capable of in the wrong hands, I shut it down and stopped manufacturing.
"Tony, you chose to do that. If we sign this, we surrender our right to choose. What if this panel sends us somewhere we don't think we should go? What if there is somewhere we need to go, and they don't let us? We may not be perfect, but the safest hands are still our own."
"If we don't do this now, it's gonna be done to us later. That's a fact. That won't be pretty."
Wanda finally speaks up, "You're saying they'll come for me."
"We would protect you," Vision promised.
"Maybe Tony's right," the redhead speaks. "If we have one hand on the wheel, we can still steer. If we take it off--"
"Aren't you the same woman who told the government to kiss her ass a few years ago?" Sam interrupts.
"I'm just... I'm reading the terrain. We have made... some very public mistakes. We need to win their trust back.
"Focus up," Tony says. "I'm sorry, did I just mishear or did you agree with me?"
"Oh, I want to take it back now."
"No, no, no. You can't retract it. Thank you. Unprecedented. Okay, case-closed--I win."
From what you see, Steve stands to leave abruptly.
You then walk out of the elevator, tablet still in hand with the footage up. The captain walks past you just as you turn the corner and spot the team.
"Someone's upset," you hum.
You walk past everyone towards the fridge and grab a water bottle.
"Anyway, that was very childish. And kinda stupid."
Inquisitive looks are thrown your way and you hold up the tablet awkwardly as you plop down on a chair.
"I was watching you. I kinda do that a lot. It's not as creepy as it sounds."
You open the bottle and take a sip.
"What are you doing down here kid--"
"Ahhh," you interrupt. "Don't call me a kid. I haven't been a child for years."
"Just answer the question," Tony snaps.
"I like to stay informed. No one tells me anything and while you think that these private meetings only affect you, it doesn't. It affects me too. You may not remember I'm your child but several people do. And that puts me in danger. So yes, I listen to your conversations to make sure it's nothing I need to worry about."
An awkward silence washes over as you gulp down more water.
"Anyway, I was just riding up and down the elevator waiting for you guys to finish. That Ross dude is kinda creepy by the way. But you're really considering signing that thing?"
"Not you too," your father mutters.
You let out a laugh and everyone looks at you strangely.
"Is this funny to you?" Rhodey asks.
"Yes," you stop laughing abruptly. "I find it hilarious that this is the same government that was ready to drop a nuke on the city during the Battle of New York not giving a damn about a single civilian that was still in the area. I find it hilarious that this is the same government that lets thousands of children and women of color go missing and not do a thing about it. It's funny that this is the same government that let HYDRA, Red Room, AIM; all that shit grow right under their nose. It's funny because this government is the same one that uses taxpayer money for dumb ass projects and unneccassary military funding instead of using it to fund shit that helps the civilians they claim they care so much about. I mean how can you not find this situation amusing?"
"Look," Tony attempts.
"I'm not finished," you challenge, looking him dead in the eyes. "This government don't give a damn about y'all, especially not the three of us," you say, gesturing to yourself, Sam, and Rhodey. "We'd be booted out of this country before you could even blink if they ever got the chance and you know that.
"I don't know why y'all are so adamant on gaining the government's trust when they don't give a flying fuck about you or these goddamn civilians. All they care about is power. They don't care how many civilians come up missing or die in some tragic accident. It doesn't matter what happens. When they see someone becoming richer or smarter or more powerful than they are, they will do anything to shut that shit down.
"I don't understand how you can't see that. And maybe it's just me. Maybe it's just me and my experience," you pause, catching the gaze of every person in the room with hard eyes. You take a deep breath and try to calm down. "Sign it if you want to. Think about how many lives you'll lose then."
You stand from your spot and walk into the open elevator, ready to get to the comfort of your bed.
-
It had been two days since the initial meeting and you were currently sitting on Michelle's bed watching her read.
"You're really pretty," you muttered out of the blue.
You saw your girlfriend's cheeks develop a subtle red tint as she mumbled back a 'thank you, and continued reading. You groan and gently pull the book out of her hands.
"Hey," she quietly protests.
"Please," you pout, holding your arms out as an invitation.
MJ fondly rolls her eyes before lowering herself onto you. You hummed contently and squeezed her before planting a kiss on her cheek.
She surprised you by turning her head and giving you a lingering kiss. That one kiss soon turned into something more.
Michelle gently pushed you onto your back and straddled your hips. Bending down she kissed you once again, her lips gliding with yours.
This continued for a few minutes, taking small breaks in between to breathe. You don't think you could ever get enough of her and hoped that she was feeling similarly.
You kissed until your jaws hurt. The euphoric feeling still lingered as MJ rested her forehead against yours, trying to catch her breath.
"We should do that again sometime," you mumbled.
Your girlfriend nodded in response, giving one more chaste kiss to your lips before dropping to your side.
"Tomorrow," she said after glancing at the clock that read 10:47.
"Guess I'm spending the night then."
"I have no problem with that."
-
The next day, you were awoken by beeping from your phone. Once you were fully aware of your surroundings you picked up the device and read the notifications that M.I.A sent through. Scanning through them, you sat up with urgency and played the video.
"A bomb hidden in a news van ripped through the UN building in Vienna. More than 70 people have been injured. At least 12 are dead, including Wakanda's King T'Chaka. Officials have released a video of a suspect who they have identified as James Buchanan Bares, the Winter Soldier. The infamous HYDRA agent, linked to numerous acts of terroism and political assassinations."
Carefully removing Michelle's arm from around your waist, you stand up and move to the corner of the room. You press the contact and hold the phone up to your ear.
"Nat what the fuck is going on?"
You hear the woman sigh on the other side of the phone.
"Look, just... stay wherever you are."
"Yeah, okay, whatever. I want answers, Nat."
"(Y/n)," she says firmly. "Calm down and go back to whatever you were doing. Right now, this does not concern you and I would like it to stay that way. Do you understand me?"
There was some silence, before you let out a forced chuckle.
"Okay, whatever. Bye."
"(Y/n) c'mo--"
You disconnected the call and gently tossed the phone onto MJ's desk.
"You sound stressed."
Turning around to face the bed, you see Michelle sat up and leaning against the headboard. You nod slowly and crawl your way up towards her.
"I am."
You feel her hand take hold of your clenched ones and she rubs them, causing you to relax slightly.
"There was a um, bombing at the--the um... signing thing. And no one wants to tell me what's going on, so," you end the sentence, shrugging.
MJ's head drops onto your shoulder and you let her cuddle close.
"They told me to stay where I was. So hopefully we can get something good out of that."
There was no response and you thought she had fallen back asleep, but you were proven wrong when your girlfriend started getting up.
"C'mon," she instructed, holding her hand out when she saw the look of confusion on your face.
Taking her hand, the two of you made your way to the kitchen.
She turned around and grabbed your shoulders.
"We are going to make some breakfast... or lunch whatever. And then we are going to binge watch until we can binge watch no longer. Alright?"
You nod your head, chuckling and then got to work.
-
It had been days since you last heard from anyone. No updates from Natasha. M.I.A even told you there hasn't even been a great deal of movement in the compound. Today you decided you would head back.
When you arrived it was quiet. As you walked down the halls you heard distant chatter and followed it.
Turning the corner, you were surprised at what you saw.
"What the hell happened?"
The two men turned to look your way, but you were given no answers.
Tony had bruises on his face and he looked more tense than usual. Rhodey had some sort of tech on his legs.
"You fought them. You fought them all, didn't you?"
Both men looked away and avoided your gaze.
"You didn't even listen to what I said. This is what the government does. I tried to tell you, but you didn't even fucking listen," you ranted, your voice slightly raising.
"Us breaking apart wasn't the government. Most of this is on some guy th--"
"Well the government allowed it to happen so I'd say it is their fault!"
You turned to your father with pleading eyes.
"Where are they, Tony?"
"Kid, they're criminals now, I don't--"
"Stop calling me that! I'm--I'm not some kid. I'm not your kid," you let out a frustrated breath. "You--you couldn't talk it out? Like mature adults? You just had to go assert your dominance somewhere--in what? An--an airport? Some vacant lot? You just had to fight. Do you not know how to communicate?"
You looked at the two men, shook your head, and brushed past them.
Just when things were alright.
-
"(Y/n)?"
"What M.I.A?"
You were currently laying in your bed trying to control the tears that were begging to fall from your eyes due to the amount of overwhelming shit you had been hit with. You talked with MJ for a little while and while it helped a bit, you honestly were still feeling like... well shit.
"There's a package for you."
Furrowing your eyebrows, you head down to where the mail is usually placed, get the package with your name on it, and head back to your room.
Grabbing a pair of scissors, you cut the tape and open the box. Inside was a letter and a phone.
Hey sweetheart.
It was Natasha's handwriting.
I'm sorry. I really am. We all are. I wish things wouldn't have ended this way, but they did and we can't really do anything about it now.
I listened to what you said. I listened and I tried my best to understand. I don't think I ever wanted to sign the accords in the first place. The only reason I did so was so that we could stay together. So that I could stay with you. This team is the only family I've had in a long time. The fact that that stack of papers could end that scared me.
I just kept trying to convince myself that signing the Accords was the right thing to do; anything to keep this team together. Anything to keep everything from falling apart.
But the more I thought about it, I realized. You were right. Everything you said. This government doesn't care. And if the government doesn't care like they're supposed to then we need to. People need the government, but they don't have it. They do have us though. And they always will.
I love you. I didn't say it enough and I don't know when or if I'll ever get to tell you that again. You are so precious to me and I'm sorry I couldn't stay. If you ever need anything, you can always give me a call.
You wiped your eyes and gently picked up the phone. You held it in your hands for a moment before setting it down. You folded the letter back up neatly and placed both items in the top drawer of your nightstand.
You laid back down on your bed with less tears on your face.