A Drawing of Me and You (An OuMota Fanfic)

Chapter 13: Unspoken Words

[Kaito's POV]

Sniffle sniffle.

"I'm sorry, Kokichi.. Maybe I've hid a bit too much from everyone," I spoke, more cold tears rolling down my face. It was like the air turned frozen, and rather hard to breathe in.
Why was I breaking apart like this in front of him? This is such a bad impression of myself.
Why can't I even express my own emotions right?

My eyes darted away from him and towards the ground with heavy, short breaths.
It feels like I'm dying all over again.. Damn it! Damn it! DAMN IT!
I can't die again! Can I? I still need to say my feelings to him. All of my goals can't be accomplished if I don't live!
Grasping onto each breath like it's my last.. Reaching and reaching for more.

What grasped me back into reality was Kokichi's voice and the feeling of him holding me close in some desperation to make things better.
"Kaito! Are you okay damn it?!" He called out, holding onto me like his life depended on it as much as mine.
It was like everything clicked back together, and I saw his face. Worried teary.
I did this?.. My emotions got in the way. I feel rather guilty.

I shook my head. "Yeah, I'm fine!" I reassured him, even if I wasn't really alright. It's just my natural response after all.

".. That's a dumb question from me. It's obvious you're not," Kokichi facepalmed himself, glancing back to me. "It's alright to say your feelings, you know?" He added on, being rather more caring or loving to me. It was something I hadn't experienced before, but I liked it.
Comfort in someone else; instead of just hiding them away to sulk about and reset later to just show happiness.

In return, I gave a slow nod.
"Yeah, I know. It's easier said though for me than being able to do it," I let out a small chuckle. "You understand what I mean too, right?" I asked him the question, smile returning just like it usually did.

"Hey, don't turn this on me. I'm focused on how you're feeling, dummy! You've been.. Really concerning me lately Momota-Chan," You could easily tell Kokichi was being serious for once. Not some lighthearted banter, but him genuinely caring about my well-being. About me.

I don't want him to leave my side, especially not now. Not ever. Is this what it's like to fall in love with someone even more than I feel like I should?

"I really would ask why but I feel it's too obvious for the both of us at this point," I chuckled, trying to brighten the mood.

"Spacey, it's fine to show your emotions. You're a person too. You deserve to be truly happy as well. Hell, you out of anyone deserves it." Kokichi suddenly said that to me. Said it in the most genuine way possible.

It made me stop and think for a few moments about what I should say next. It was the words I've always wanted to hear, straight from his mouth. Maybe another thing I've wanted to hear most from him was I love you.

I just knew those words would never come.

I'm sure he only thinks of me as a friend. Nothing more.
He's stated it before after all! Then again, spending time with others can really change people. Hell, it's surely changed me for the better. He's helped me recognize I can be truly happy. That my emotions are just as important to others as their emotions are to me.
If I'm with him, and nobody else, maybe I can finally say I love you for the first time. I can no longer be blinded by the fact we were rivals and consider it just the fact we've gotten closer as friends to hide the fact I have feelings for him.

I started chuckling. Happiness? Sure. Hell it was! Bursting with joy! But also with the slight tinge of hope that maybe things do have happy endings! They could come true!