Steel Hearts

- 39 -

Andrew had graciously kept the girls overnight, allowing Steve and I to rest easy knowing they would be safe with him. Everyone had decided to turn in not soon after we finished brainstorming, though chances are that they wouldn't get much sleep. We all were on edge and anxious about our plan not going as hoped.

It took about thirty minutes of digging through boxes, but we found the old suits we had worn during the Battle of New York. Steve's was cleaned and hanging up along with everyone else's suits. I had been able to find some reference photos of old S.H.I.E.L.D. armor for Tony and set them on the table beside my all-black suit. Everyone had their quantum realm suits hung next to the ones they normally wear.

While I hung the suits on the rack, Steve set out an array of watches we would be using along with their weapons. His shield lay on the nearby table along with Stormbreaker, Barton's bow and quiver, and Natasha's widow bites, electroshock batons, and pistols.

Thoughts swirl around inside my head like murky lake water. Even more anxiety than before plaguing my stomach, making it churn at the thoughts of our worst-case scenario.

"Hey," Steve's hands gently covered my own. I had unconsciously been picking at the skin around my nails, causing my cuticles to threaten to bleed. "What are you thinking?"

"What if it doesn't work?"

My eyes meet his in a desperate attempt to find comfort in his confidence. He sighs, ultimately knowing that we might have this conversation once again.

"Dove-"

"Steve, I'm serious. What if something bad happens and someone doesn't make it back? And what happens when we do bring everyone back? It's been five years. The world has moved on, it can't just go back to the way it was!" Anxiously raking my fingers through the loose ends of my ponytail, I take a few small steps away from him before turning around, "Wh... what if we bring Thanos back too? What if he just snaps everyone away this time?"

Steve now had his arms crossed and he was more frustrated than he was previously concerned. Leaning against the table behind him, he sighs loudly before moving to stand in front of me, "That won't happen."

"How do you know that?"

"Because we won't let it happen," he runs his hands up my arms, cupping my cheeks between them so I would look up at him. "I just want you to know that if worse comes to worst, I'm not leaving you. I'll be right here with you. And if it comes down to it, we'll fight like hell; for our family and our friends."

Steve runs the pad of his thumb across my cheek, wiping away a stray tear that had fallen.

"I hate how optimistic you are sometimes," I sniffle with a forced laugh, wiping away my tears with the sleeve of my shirt roughly with a sigh.

"We're going to get everyone back... Sam, Bucky, Wanda... everyone," and after a few seconds, Steve whispers, "You know Thanos wasn't your fault, right?"

My world comes grinding to a halt; as if the world stopped spinning and all of the air in the atmosphere was sucked right out. Steve's words were a punch to the gut. It was my fault. I couldn't stop him from taking the mind stone. I couldn't stop him from snapping. If I had gotten up and helped Thor, we wouldn't be in this position. Half of the universe wouldn't have turned to dust. None of this would've happened if I had just stood up.

"Don't make this harder than it already is, Steve," I step away from him, disbelief showing apparent on my features.

He shakes his head, "Don't do this to yourself."

"Why not?"

"You can't blame yourself."

"I try not to, all the time, but I can't help it! None of us could stop him five years ago, so what makes us think that this insane plan is going to work now? What if we screw something up and make things worse?"