Sans AU Oneshots [Requests Closed]

[Bad Sanses Household]

Just a bunch of funny(?) moments that can't be made into full stories

-Killer and Dust-

     "KILLER!"
     "Oh, fuck-"

     Smack. Swapfell laughed as Killer earned a smack on the cheek from Horror.
     "Owww...." Killer groaned.
     "What did you do?" He asked the 'crying' male in front of him.
     "Oh, Y'know, I just fucked Dust." Killer mumbled sarcastically. Fell spit out his water.
     "WHAT?"
     "Relax... I didn't fuck him!"
     "KILLER I SWEAR TO GOD, IF I'M NOT ABLE TO WALK TODAY-!" Swapfell let out a long sigh as Killer awkwardly chuckled.
     "Okay..." Horror scowled. "I may have fucked him..."

-Dust is too Smart to be a Sans-

     "Hey, Boss?" Dust asked.
     "Yes?" Nightmare looked up from his notebook.
     "So, Y'know how you said that the only two Sanses that could do illusion magic were from a destroyed AU?" Nightmare didn't like where this was going.
    
      "Yes..? What about it?"
     "Well.." Dust nervously grinned, but he barely knows how to smile so he just looks likes he's in pain.
     "I did some research with Error, and-" Nightmare sighed. "I have some questions about it."
     "Ask away."
     "Well, the only destroyed AU that could possibly have illusion magic would be where Dream is from, since we've seen him use it on the battle field."

     Night nodded. "The AUs that he could be from, considering his fighting style, clothing choice, and how he talks, would be: Fantasytale, Inktale, and one other AU. Obviously he's not from Inktale, since Ink's from that AU, and as far as the information shows, only had one Sans. Fantasytale would be a good guess if it didn't still have the Sans and Papyrus, proving that there was/is only one Sans."
    
     "So, where did Dream come from?"
     "Well, the third AU is what caught my attention; Dreamtale." Nightmare flinched slightly at the sound of his AU. "I'm willing to bet my lack of sanity that that's the AU Dream came from."
     "Bingo. We have a winner." The octopus like one of the two cheered, unenthusiastically.   

     "That's not what caught my attention though." Nightmare raised an eyebrow. "It says that there were more than one Sans, and you said that there were two Sanses who could do illusion magic." Night chuckled.
     "Did I now?"
     "Mhmm." The hooded male hummed. "Dream wasn't the only Sans that lived there, and it does in facts say, in perfect binary, in the damn coding, Dream had a brother."

     Nightmare nodded, scribbling something down on his notepad.
     "I distinctly remember you saying you had a brother. To quote you, 'I do have a sibling. A brother. But we're polar opposites, and don't talk very much anymore. He's dead to me.' Polar opposites is a pretty spot on way to define the literal Monarch of Negativity, and the King/Prince—according to the coding he isn't really yet the King, but he's getting there—of positivity. You also said that your AU was destroyed, just like Dreams."
    
     'Clever, huh?'
     "So, my question for you, Boss, is, can you do illusion magic? Are you the second Sans?" Nightmare laughed softly and nodded.
     "Correct."
     "Good, because if not the fact that so much of you and Dreams backstories are alike would drive me more insane than I already am. If that's even possible."

567 words
A/N: Holy f[lip] that took a lot of tipity typying to do- I'll probably add more to this or make another story will additional short stories. Bye!