the moral of the story

chapter thirty-three: like a bad season finale of riverdale

i've always hated how vulnerable i can be. i swear, all it takes is a slight raise in voice, and i'm in a puddle of tears. i remember this one time at the grocery store when i think i was like eight or something. verona and i were screwing around, probably making a scene and embarrassing our poor mother. and this manager came and sternly told us that we needed to behave, and i swear to god, right there in the checkout line, i had a meltdown. it took my mom almost forty-five minutes to calm me down, and i still haven't set foot in that grocery store since that day.

so i'm not surprised when i leave oliver's trailer and collapse into diana's arms, who's been waiting patiently for me to get through to him. we draw a few eyes, i'm sure, but no one comes over to kick me off the set for trespassing. instead, diana leads me to her car, drives me home, and guides me up to my room. neither of my parents have returned yet, so diana stays with me while i cry.

"th-this is so-so stupid." i hiccup as diana hands me another tissue. i blow into it, closing my eyes and feeling more tears come. "i'm s-sorry you have t-to see this. y-you don't have t-to."

"are you kidding?" diana asks with an amused grin. "what kinda best friend would i be if i let you cry by yourself? besides, i think this is the most emotion i've ever seen from you. it's refreshing to know that you're human like the rest of us."

and i can't help but laugh at her comment, bringing my hand up to cover my mouth. diana just grins back, and i have to assume that her goal was to get me to smile. mission accomplished, i guess. but despite my laughter, i'm reminded of everything that just happened when oliver's face flashes into my mind, like it does every five seconds now. i sniffle and wipe away some stray tears.

"i'm sorry oliver was an ass." diana says, reaching out to cover my hand with hers. "i didn't think he would be drunk. i'm not sure if he's ever been drunk. a lot of shit went down with his alcoholic dad when he was a kid, so he tries his best not to even go near it. god, it's just so unlike him."

"i-i don't blame him." i hiccup, feeling my throat well up to the size of a baseball. "i was a c-complete bitch to him. he p-poured his heart out t-to me and i st-stomped on it. i d-deserved it."

"no, no, no." diana rushes, gripping my hand so tight i'm surprised the circulation is still there. "no, florence, you absolutely cannot blame yourself for oliver's shitty behavior. yes, he's one of my best friends, but you're my best friend too. and it means a little more because you're a girl, and us girls gotta stick together. it's a patriarchy that we live in, and i won't let you think you deserve anything less than what you actually do. and florence, you deserve everything in the world."

now i'm sobbing even harder, and at first, i'm not sure why. but then i realize that no one has cared this much about me in a long time. my mom has always cared about me, and oliver's not made it clear to me that he actually cares about me. but diana, there's so much about her that i can't help but adore. she is the complete opposite of hallie, who sold me to become a social climber and to please her parents. diana's like when it's so sunny out that you're all hot and you can't see anything, but then you remember. how cold and lonely you were before and how grateful you are to be...warmed. 

"oh god, what now? i'm so sorry, uh—" diana rushes until i stop her.

"no, no." i sniffle, feeling myself smile. "it's just...it's really comforting to know that you care that much about me, di. you know, at first i thought you were jsut this irritating, bubbly, fake celebrity who just saw me as a charity case. but now, it's like you're my own little personal best friend."

diana throws her head back and laughs at my comment, showing off her perfectly aligned white teeth. she weaves her manicured fingers through her sun-blonde hair and meets my eyes. "well, i guess i can say the same for you, florence. i'm so glad that we're friends. i'm not the best at keeping them, ollie's the only exception. so i think it's best that we stick together. what do you say, besties?"